14.12.23.
another chapter today
because i had a realisation.a realisation i was supposed to have and act on a lot earlier but here we are.
i will do my best this time.
it just seems very pathetic to think about a person so much when they have never cared about you.the more i think about it.
the angrier i get.
i can't believe i tortured myself like this.friends don't do this.
they don't attack you for every single thing you say.
they don't mock and insult you just because you cried once during a sad movie.
they don't make you feel like you
would be better off dead.and the fact that i keep thinking about those negative things instead of focusing on myself and the positive stuff is just pure self-sabotage.
so i will do my best to focus on the good things and document them instead of going all depressed about someone who doesn't care a gram about me.
to new beginnings i guess.
this time i will make it worthwhile.