TAYLOR: My music is great
Got such a pretty face
That's what people say, mmm-hmm
I get so much praise, mmm-hmm
Yes, they say some mean things, too
But all of it is true
I date way too many guys, mmm-hmm
There's no way to deny, nuh-uh
My life's the greatest
I'm so rich and famous
But I'm still complaining
Because I'm perfect
And my life should be but its not
All my songs are just the same same same same same
I do not care what you say say say say say
I won't acknowledge the hate and I'll just shake
I shake it off
HATER 1: That statement's false!
If you really weren't offended by the hate
You wouldn't have written this in the first place
Plus you never ever ever shake your heartbreak
You make a song!
TAYLOR: Don't piss me off!
I'm listing reasons why
I have a shitty life
Because I really need mmm-hmm
More people to love me mmm-hmm
I sadly only own (sadly only own)
Four huge, expensive homes (huge, expensive homes)
You should feel bad for me [sniffles]
And buy my new CD, mmm-hmm
My ego's bloated
So I never notice
All my fans, I just focus
On anyone
Who points out my tiniest flaw
To expand my already giant fanbase
I'm attempting to dress up like every race
BLACK GUY: Why you trying to wear thug clothes? You're a disgrace
Take it off! Take it off!
TAYLOR: Now I will surround myself with tons of fans
Just to cover up the fact that when I dance
It looks like I'm having some kind of attack
FAN 1: Call the doc!
HATER 2: Make it stop!
TAYLOR: Hey hey hey
Just think you said it couldn't get worse than me going from country to pop but I'm gonna prove you wrong
Cause now you get to listen
This dumb rap!
I brought in a ton of my fans
As part of my plan to make whole world my fanbase
You will never ever leave, because you belong to me
And you will forever be
Queen Tay Tay's slaves
FANS: We pledge our souls to you, Taylor.
TAYLOR: I have finally become a fame monster
With my Swifties, I can now rule all the earth
FAN 2: What is up with that black turtle-neck sweater?
You look a lot like Steve Jobs
TAYLOR: Together we will track down all my "mistakes"
Get them all and wipe out any trace of hate
And kill anyone who doesn't praise Tay Tay
POLICE: Taylor stop! We're the cops!
Hurry, boys, get her cuffed
So we can lock her up
You're going to do time
For this horrendous crime
Normally, you'd be fine
Since you're pure-blooded white
But you're not since you look
Like you are from the hood
