𝑴𝒆𝒍𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑰𝒄𝒆 | 𝒈𝒙𝒈

𝑺𝒉𝒊𝒕

"Fuck I'm sorry!" I heard someone yell and we both looked over, it was Heather, her face was a mix of shocked and terrified.

Panic washed over my body and I let go of her, I think I almost slammed her against the wall from how panicked I was. Both of us were still looking in the direction of the door which was now wide open, I could see everyone watching us.

"Shit" Emily muttered under her breath, before I could even look at her she was already gone. She stormed out of the room and before my legs obeyed my brain's command I heard the front door shut, still reverberating from how hard she had slammed it.

I just stood there, my legs couldn't move, it felt as if they weighed a ton and I had no power left in me to move them.

My mind was blank, completely empty. There were no thoughts, no anger, nothing. I couldn't come up with one single thought to hold in it.

"Alex" I heard Heather's voice.

"Alex you're crying" it was louder this time, she had gotten closer to me.

I felt her hand reaching for my shoulder but I flinched at her touch and she immediately backed away. The last thing I wanted was her hand to touch me, I didn't want all of them looking at me, I wanted to be by myself.

"Get out" I whispered as I felt thick hot tears running down my cheeks, my vision getting blurry.

I think my whisper was so weak she hadn't even heard it as she was still standing next to me, everyone else were watching from outside the room as the door was still opened.

"Get out" my voice louder "Just get out of my fucking house, all of you get out!" I yelled desperately, my fists clenched, my nails digging against my own skin.

"Okay, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry" she apologized again, it wasn't even her fault but I just wanted everyone out.

"Just leave" my voice was soft this time, I was begging her to leave me alone and she did.

They all did.

I stood in that room, my legs hadn't moved yet, I couldn't function.

I just wanted to disappear.

...

I woke up from the blinding light hitting my face. I don't remember how I even got into my bed, or at what point did I leave the room. I noticed I was naked, wearing nothing but the black lace panties I had worn last night. My makeup was still on, apparently I didn't bother to take it off last night.

Everything is a mess.

I tried to avoid the thoughts of last night for as long as I could, I was not in the correct mental state to deal with that mess right now. Now, I just wanted to disappear.

I got up and took a long shower, increasing the temperature until I felt it sting, I just needed a distraction. I washed my hair and my body, scrubbing hard trying to get rid of the gross feeling that I had. I felt dirty and violated, and it was no one's fault but mine. I shouldn't have lost control like that, I should've just let her do whatever and not switch us around, it would've been better if I was the one who got caught like this and not her.

I turned the water off after what seemed like forever and wrapped myself in a towel, I still had to brush my teeth and my hair. So I did, I brushed my teeth and used the mouthwash, I could still taste the alcohol in my mouth and it was awful. Then I put my hair in a bun, not even caring how it looked, and I got dressed. I picked burgundy sweats and a matching white hoodie from my closet, I wanted to wear something that was the closest to a hug, and it feels like a hoodie is the right choice.