You know it's hard living at home for college breaks when your bedroom feels more like a storage closet. Bins stacked on top of eachother. Broken vacuum cleaners as room decor. Seeing the shadow of my oldself in the stuffed animals that now sit in the corner peaking over the old living room side table, or the crumble and bent posters that used to line my old room walls buried under snow globes and CDs. The only furniture I can call actual furniture being the bed I sleep in, the night stand that's so crowded it's not able to be used properly, and the old storage ottoman that has torn marks along it's corners from years of cat scratches.
It wasn't always like this. Before collage I had a bedroom, one with a proper TV stand for the TV I bought myself, dresser, bed. Before college I had what is now my sister's room, we switched because she wanted to and being the older sister I gave in because "why would it matter I won't be home as often anymore." That was the logic behind my sisters thinking. Everything seemed fine then but then winter break came my freshman year and my dresser left. My mom declared that my sister need more storage and that I didn't have the space in my room at the time because of the old head and foot boards and clothing rack. that I would survive. Right? Its been a year since then so my clothes live in Totes and the suitcase I bring to and from college.
Now my sister has that. 2 dressers, a vanity, a desk, new bedding. seemingly everything she could ever want or need she has. Posters line her walls just like mine did. Funko Pops lined up in a row like mine did. The shelves I hang it that room she now uses. I feel a great deal of jealousy towards her, she seemingly has everything and doesn't even know it. It's hard being the older sister willing to give up anything because giving in is easier than standing up sometimes. She has everything I could want right now, I'd even settle for a dresser. Something to make the storage closet feel more like a room again.
YOU ARE READING
The Reality of Being the Eldest Sister
Non-Fictionthese are just going to be word vomits of my feeling. if anyone does read this who has similar experience I hope you are able to resonate with my words.
