.-• Kissable Scars.. •-. (Kazuscara<3) (honestly i suck at making titles)

Realization 😨

~ Scaramouche POV ~
- ~•~ -

(Sorry that this is another Scaramouche POV and not a Kazuha, but I really couldn't think of anything to write about that involves him yet.)

—/—

It had been a couple days since Monday, and now it was almost the end of the week. I had hung out with Kazuha's group, at lunch at least, and I guess they were okay. Venti's a little loud... and Xiao doesn't seem to like me much, and plus Heizou's there too and I basically have a full blown panic attack every time he is mentioned. I don't know why I still come, but I guess it's because Kazuha drags me with him everyday.

It's currently Thursday afternoon, and I basically have nothing to do except lie in my bed and drown in my own thoughts. What a great way to spend my free time.

Not sure what reminded me, but I suddenly remembered the conversation me and Childe had on Monday. Something quite surprising, was that he was gay. I guess it's not bad... it's just, I never really thought about a boy with a boy before.

Okay, so maybe that was a lie to take my mind off a certain event that reminded me of, because I technically dated a guy before? It makes me want to vomit though, so I guess not..? Anyways, I don't want to date a guy ever again, not if they're all like that.

Childe also mentioned that I have a crush on Kazuha? I don't understand why he would think that, because what do you mean, "I blush a lot everytime I see him"?? Because, for one, no.

There's just— no way I'd have a crush on Kazuha. Plus he's probably straight, so even if I did, it wouldn't work out.

Is he straight? God I hope not...

Wait— huh?! I did not just think that. Okay, shut up, me. Shut up.

...Do I really have feelings for Kazuha..?

I'm not gay, so I'm not sure why I would. But Childe is a bit right I guess... I feel my face heat up whenever he laughs, and I get this fluttering feeling in my chest whenever I talk to him...

Fuck. Do I actually like Kazuha??

He is pretty for a guy, I guess, I'll give him that. But that doesn't mean I like him. I've only known him for less than a week, so why would I even have a crush on him? It makes no sense.

I probably don't, it's fine. It's fine. It's fine.

Shook out of my thoughts, I heard my doorbell ring. Raiden was home, and Mother wasn't coming home until next month. Who could it be..? Maybe one of Raiden's many girlfriends? Possibly. I should just let her answer the door then.

"Kunikuzushi! Your friend is here!!" I heard Raiden yell out to me from down stairs. Well fuck, I wasn't expecting anyone to come over. I'd really like to hide in my room, but I wouldn't want to be impolite.

I groaned, walking downstairs. I guess I have to say hi, at least. As I walked to the front door, I saw Childe standing outside. Fuck.

"Go away." I demanded, pointing outside. His response to my demand was a simple smile. He then invited himself inside, when up to my room, and sat on my bed.

"Wow! I haven't been here in ages!" Childe exasperated, grinning ear to ear. I wish he would leave already, but I quite frankly don't have the energy to push him from here to my door and kick him out.

"What do you want?" I bluntly inquired. I don't want him here for long, so it's better to just get the information out of him now than to drag it on. I folded my arms, glaring at the ginger.

"I just want to talk~ come on, Scaramouche!" I could tell Childe was being a bit more serious, since he actually called me by my name instead of my nickname, so I guess I'll give him some kind of day.

"Fine, whatever, spill it." I voiced promptly, waiting for Childe to start blabbering on about whatever shit he wanted to talk about.

"Hmm.. oh yeah! Let me tell you about my soon to be boyfriend~" Ah, I forgot Childe had a crush on someone. I don't know how I forgot about it, considering he told me like 4 days ago and I was super shocked.

"Let me pull up a picture~!" Childe said, quickly scrolling through something on his phone. He kept on scrolling until a smile propped up on his face, and he turned his phone around so I could see the picture. Wait a minute—

"CHILDE! That's a teacher at our school! Are you actually being serious about this? Because I doubt anything's going to happen." I felt quite surprised, because no way is Childe having a crush on Mr. Zhongli! That's so... weird...

"I know, I know... But! He's super hot, and I'll be a senior next year, so it's only two more years till I can date him! At least, legally..." Childe tried to reason with me, to which I was utterly mortified. So ew, Childe has a crush on my history teacher. Oh! That also reminds me, I almost forgot that Childe was two years older than me. Guess you kind of forget when someone is your friend. Wait-! Ew, no, Childe is not my friend anymore.

"Ew, Childe..." I stuck my tongue out as I scrunched my face, exaggerating my reaction. I mean, I guess Mr. Zhongli is pretty young, but that's still at least a 5 year age gap! Also, where did Childe get it in his head that he thought he would have a chance with someone like that?!

"Anyways... oh yeah! How's it going with Kazuha?~" Childe questioned, his voice playful. I really didn't want to answer him. I know I don't like Kazuha, at least, I don't think I do.. but, Childe's going to keep probing me about it if he thinks I'm not telling the truth!

Suddenly, my savior came, when I got a ding from my phone. Fuck yes, an excuse not to answer!

I opened my phone, ignoring Childe's absurd question. Childe leaned over, peeking at my phone. Oh well, it's better than talking about Kazuha.

Oh... it's a notification about our junior high, from.. Heizou..? I'd rather not click on it, so I closed my phone. I never saw that. Nope, not ever.

"Why didn't you click on it?" Childe asked from behind me, I flinched as I got startled. Well, when did he get there?! "That reminds me, why did you get kicked out of school?" Childe asked, clearing seeming interested in the topic.

"Ah! Uhm..." I didn't really want to talk about it. But, then again, if I tell Childe he probably won't tell anyone about it. And maybe... he can help me stop Heizou from telling others.

"Oh..! If you don't want to tell me, that's alright!" Childe quickly realized I was a bit uncomfortable, scooting away subtly. I guess I should tell him, even if all that telling him does is relieve a bit of weight from my chest, I guess it's okay.

"No, it's fine. I'll tell you. It's kind of a long story, so you might want to sit down." I said, sitting down at the chair at my desk as he took a seat on my bed.

"So what happened was..."

//-//

Words: 1248

Well, that's the end of that chapter! Hope you all enjoyed, and sorry for not uploading this chapter sooner. I had a bit of a writers block for about two days, so I couldn't really get this done as fast as I wanted to. But nonetheless, I'll try to get the next chapter out faster. Anyways, I hope all of you enjoyed this chapter, and see you in the next one! ٩(^‿^)۶