Dr. Eggman: Over 2,000 years ago humanity's fate hangs in balance from survival or execution.
Bowser: All thanks to the power that let's the turn into giant man eating humanoids that can tower above cities.
Dr. Wily: These are Titans some of humanity's worst enemies. These Titans can tower above cities eating or flattening.
Bowser: This is some dangerous Honkai Impact 3rd vibes here.
Dr. Eggman: And over 2000 years later being at near extinction, humanity lived on the Island of Paradis, where they lived behind giant walls to keep them safe no one dared to leave.
Bowser: But there was one boy who had one goal: To explore the world outside of the walls and gain freedom as much as he wished, Eren Yeager.
Dr. Wily: As a young child Eren always wanted to live freely and explore the world outside of the walls he lives.
Bowser: And even at that age he was willing to throw hands with anyone to get it. He killed sex traffickers and saved a young girl named Mikasa who became his adopted sister and even beat the shit out of bullies and saved this kid named Armin who became his friend. Not even a teenager and already he has his hands dirty.
Dr. Eggman: Despite his family disagreeing with his goals to exit the walls for understandable and good reasons, Eren nonetheless lived a happy life with his friends.
Bowser: And so young Eren continued to grow up and live his happy life with his friends until he grows up has children and grandchildren and dies of old age. The end....
Bowser, Eggman, and Wily do their respective evil laughs
Bowser: No wait just kidding a giant ass Titan showed up and obliterated the walls and destroyed everything and ate his mom while poor Eren was forced to watch in terror. Ah anime and video games. Don't you just love it when nobody has a happy beginning?
We see Eren's mother about to get eaten as the "Wasted" screen from Grand Theft Auto V appears.
Dr. Wily: The traumatic experience changed Eren's point of view forever. After realizing that humans are nothing but cattle in comparison to the Titans, Eren alongside his 2 best friends joined an Anti-Titan fighting military force the Survey Corps with a new goal.
Bowser: Destroy the Titans! Every last one of them! And with some special Titan slicing train, he has more than enough tools to get the job down.
Dr. Eggman: Eren wields the 3D-Maneuver Gear is a special harness worn by all soldiers within the walls, built with grappling hooks to latch onto surfaces and pull them in, as well as gas tanks to propel them further through the air. These tools help them get above ground and within reach of the titans' weak spot.
Bowser: And once they get close enough, they pull out special hardened blades to carve into those bastards! Don't be fooled, though. These blades do break from overuse, but that's why the 3DM gear carries spares.
Dr. Wily: With the gear, Eren is relatively capable, and possesses added mobility and reach. His skill with the gear is rather impressive, given the fact that he graduated the top 5 in his Regiment, however, he is not as experienced with the blades, having only one titan kill to his blades.
Bowser: Well that sucks because I thought he would slice more of them down seeing as those chicks from Honkai can do it.
Dr. Eggman: Bowser don't say another word.
Bowser: What why?!
The alarm goes off
Alarm: Intruder alert! Intruder alert! The base has been breached two suspects appear on the first floor!
Dr. Wily: Oh crap it's Shadow and Zero they've broken into the base.
Bowser: Geez are they still made because they didn't get to be the hosts of the last episode? Calm down it's just a gacha game like come on. And besides Daisy and Blaze took that episode so go after them.
Dr. Wily: We can talk later right now we have a base to defend.
Bowser: Alright!
Dr. Eggman: When we're not holding off Shadow and Zero we'll be back next time to go over Eren's opponent, Ken Kaneki. All available troops stop those intruders now!
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