FRIDAY, 22 DECEMBER
My relationship with Stefan has been smooth, we've been cruising quite nicely for the past month.
I'm currently in his house with Ivy and we're in the kitchen. She is on her high chair watching cartoons and I'm making dinner.
Me: is Ivy coming with Angel to work tomorrow?
Ivy: yes, Ivy go to work with Angel.
Me: okay.
Ivy: mama.
Me: yes, baby?
Ivy: daddy, ate Ivy's fruit snacks.
Me: daddy ate Ivys's fruit snacks?
Ivy: yes.
Me: daddy will buy Ivy more.
Ivy: okay.
She takes a sip of her water and pushes ber hair back. I really need to do something about it, she has been complaining about saying that it's annoying.
Me: does Ivy want braids?
Ivy: yes.
Me: okay.
I don't even know if I'll be able to do them with her hair type but it won't hurt to try.
After making dinner, we eat and head up to Ivy's room where I braid her hair while we watch some 'Frozen'.
Well, more like she's watching it alone. I'm deep in thought...
In the past month, I haven't told Stefan that I love him. Firstly, I feel like it's too soon and also, I feel like it really needs to come from deep within and although it would come from deep within, I don't want to use those words so quickly. I mean, it's only been a month. But I also feel like if I'm really sure about him then it shouldn't be a problem. And I think I'm sure about him.
Stefan: what are you thinking about?
Ivy: daddy!
She runs up to him and he picks her up. He looks so sexy in his black chinos and white shirt with those three top buttons open.
Me: who your chest out for?
I say, jokingly in an American accent.
Stefan: I can explain...
He says going with it.
Me: let me guess, it's not what it looks like?
Stefan: yes.
We both burst out laughing and he gives me a kiss with Ivy blushing.
Me: how was your day?
Stefan: same old, same old.
Me: real gangster, top classified, secret stuff?
Stefan: what?
Me: nothing.
I think this man forgets how we met.
Me: your food is in the microwave.
Stefan: okay.
He puts Ivy down and heads downstairs. I finish braiding Ivy's hair and then I bathe her and dress her in some cute pajamas. I then tuck her in and play her some cartoons on her TV.
Me: goodnight, princess.
Ivy: goodnight. Angel love Ivy?
Me: yes, Angela loves Ivy?
Ivy: Ivy loves Angel too.
Me: okay, go to sleep now.
She nods and I hand her, her stuffed unicorn and I walk out. I leave the door cracked and head to my room. Well, the guest room where I sleep when I'm here.
I take a quick shower, I lotion my body and wear an oversized t-shirt. While making my bed, Stefan walks in.
Me: hey.
Stefan: hey, don't you want to come with me?
Me: where are we going?
Stefan: just come with me.
We head down to the garage and get in one of his cars before driving out. We go to the McDonald's drive thru first and get some McDonald's and then we just drive around town. We eventually stop on this other hill, it's quiet and peaceful and the soft and calming breeze just makes everything so much better.
We get out of the car and he carries me, places me on the bonnet of the car, while he stands in front of it.
Me: sometimes, I find myself missing home.
Stefan: what do you miss about home?
Me: my brother, my mom. they are my only family. well, not really but you know how families are.
Stefan: yes, I do.
Me: I miss her cooking too.
Stefan: but you pretty good in the kitchen too.
Me: not like her.
I get down and lay my head on his shoulder while my arms wrap around his forearm. He then takes his arm from me. He pulls me to stand in front of him and he wraps his arms around my neck.
His height allows him so it's the most beautiful moment ever, looking into nowhere together, while he whispers sweet somethings in my ear.
Stefan: let's go home.
He lets go of me but I want this moment to last forever so I pull him back and I wrap my arms around his neck, while he places his above my hips.
Me: or we stand here and appreciate this moment.
I stare deep into his soul and he captures my soul with only the beauty in his eyes. Those eyes hold so much love and warmth.
Before I even realise it, my lips lock with his and we share a beautiful moment. I see the sun, the stars and I melt in his arms. I keep my eyes closed throughout and he stops but I'm so amazed. I keep my eyes closed as I try to understand what magical spell this man put on me.
Stefan: you can open your eyes now.
I open my eyes and we burst out laughing.
Me: whatever.
He wraps his arms around me and I embrace him. I love it here.
After sometime, we get in the car and drive back to his house. We go to our separate rooms and I doze off after a while. A call interrupts my sleep a few minutes later.
Stefan: please come to my room, quickly?
Me: what's wrong?
Stefan: just come quickly, please.
I get out of my bed and run to his room.
Me: what's wrong?
Stefan: don't you want to cuddle?
Me: Stefan!
Stefan: what?
Me: you woke me up. for this?
Stefan: please?
Me: no.
Stefan: oh, come on. please?
I get in bed and sleep further on my side.
Stefan: it's really cold, don't you want to come closer?
Me: no.
I feel his one arm go underneath my waist and he pulls me close to him. I mean very close. He then cuddles me and the warmth in this man's arms?! Baby! I can't help but smile.
Stefan: why are you smiling, weirdo?
Me: I'm not.
Stefan: yes, you are.
Me: hush, don't ruin this moment.
Stefan: okay.
Me: my brother would kill me for being in bed with without you paying lobola first.
Stefan: what is that?
Me: bride price.
Stefan: and what amount do I have to pay for labalo?
I turn my body and lie on my back while he lies with his elbow up, supporting his head while he looks into my eyes.
Me: I could never know because the amount of lobola you pay for me is decided by my uncles. lobola is also not only about the bride price but uniting families trough the festivities of it. the singing, the dancing, the gifting and so forth. all of that unites families, it just brings them together. it's magical, I tell you.
Stefan: well, I like magic.
Me: you do?
Stefan: mmm, I mean that's how I got you.
Me: trough magic?
Stefan: yes.
Me: then you must be a horrible magician.
I say as I burst into laughter.
Stefan: you are so mean.
Me: no, I'm not. okay, sorry. how did you do it, kind sir?
Stefan: a magician never shares his tricks.
Me: oh my.
We giggle and share a kiss. We then continue to chat and we cuddle. And eventually, we fall asleep.
I find myself waking up an hour later so I head downstairs for a glass of water. I then run back upstairs and head to the bedroom and go to the ensuite where I pee and wash my hands.
I then walk back into the bedroom and Stefan is not there. I look around the entire house and don't find him. I go outside and find that there is more security than there was before.
I try to call him multiple times to no avail. I asked one of the guards and he tells me that Stefan had to leave the country urgently and for the sake of our safety, he had to maximise security.
I head back to the bedroom and find a note on the bed that read:
"Listen, I need you to care for Ivy shortly. I will be back, I promise. I love you."
Okay, what now? I sit on the bed and cry. I am not strong enough for all of this. I don't even know how to be a mother, I am just a babysitter and a photographer. I am not a mother. What will I do? Where will I begin?
