.-• Kissable Scars.. •-. (Kazuscara<3) (honestly i suck at making titles)

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~ Scaramouche POV ~
- ~•~ -

Kazuha has been acting strange.

There's no doubt about it. While he's acting more like himself now, actually talking to me, he's still... off.

He seemed a bit more distant. Most people would disagree, considering how he's literally playing with my hair right now, but something feels different. Of course, I feel somewhat at ease with the way Kazuha is touching me, even if it's only my hair. I've never liked physical touch. Not since that incident...

Wait— had Kazuha... been told what happened?

Oh god, oh god, oh god.

I could feel my face turn pale. There must've been a reason for that dream last night. Did Heizou tell Kazuha about what happened?! Fuck, fuck, fuck...

Knowing Heizou, he wouldn't even tell the complete truth! He might say something that correlates with it, but completely change it to make me look like the bad guy!

But I am the bad guy, aren't I? Heizou's told me it before— I'm a bad person. Is that why this is happening to me? I'm a horrible, disgusting, vile, person. Just like Heizou said.

My subconscious took over my physical appearance, letting only my insides crumble to bits. This was agonizing. I knew it, Heizou would tell them either way. He didn't care if I did what he said or not! He was going to do to the same thing like before. He is going to threaten me now— it's the same as before. It's the same, it's the same, it's the same...

He'll pretend to be nice, then he'll manipulate me, then he'll force me to do things-! I can't do this, I can't..

"...Scaramouche?" I heard a voice call out to me, instantly causing me to clam out from my spaced out mindset. I noticed my leg bouncing up and down on its own record, so I instantly stopped it. It seems Kazuha had been calling me. Well fuck, he must know something is wrong. If I make Kazuha worry about something that's really none of his business, Heizou could get more involved and—

"Attendance. The teacher's calling you." Kazuha whispered into my ear, sending shivers down my spine. Following Kazuha's murmur, my eyes quickly shot up to the teacher, who was patiently waiting. He seemed to be looking around the room, for me most likely.

"Here." I called out, answering to my name that I had somehow missed while lost in thought. Ah, it seems everyone's eyes are on me. It's alright, it doesn't mean a thing.

Kazuha pulls away from me, a gentle smile spreading across his face. Kazuha actually makes me feel like I'm worth something, like I'm not a horrible person. When he smiles so fondly at me, it makes me forget everything for a moment. It feels as if there is no way someone could smile like that at someone like me, and it makes me feel better.

When I say I'm a horrible person, it's not a self esteem issue. Sure, someone may as well say I'm influenced by Heizou, but that's wrong. I believe it because it's right. A good person wouldn't act the way I do.

Anyways, that's enough of the self banter. I need to figure out what in the actual fuck is going on with Kazuha. He keeps on glancing at me.

"Is there something you need?" I finally stated after I caught Kazuha glancing at me for the 100th time. My voice was quiet, the teacher would hear if I was too loud.

Kazuha looked a little shocked that I had suddenly asked him a question. He sat up straight before answering. "Uh—! N-Nothing!" Kazuha quickly answered. By the way he responded, he must've been lost in thought. And it probably wasn't anything good...

I made a 'hmm' sound in response, which didn't seem to ease him much. It was a little nice to see Kazuha on edge, though it worried me. But you don't often see Kazuha shaken from his nonchalant persona.

~/~

It was after school now, so I have to walk to my house. Fortunately, I managed to run from school, missing Childe on my way out. Thankfully I don't have to listen to him ramble on.

Nearing my house, I sense an oppressive atmosphere. She couldn't possible be..? Shit.

As I got a better view of my house, there was no doubt. Mother was home. I could see her car in the driveway, sitting perfectly inline with the other cars. I still wonder why Mother needs more than one car, but that's not the right thing to think about right now.

Mother usually comes home every couple months. I know she was due for a visit back, but she already informed us it would be in a couple weeks. Why is she here early?!

We haven't had a time to clean up or get ready. She's gonna yell at us. Mother has been especially strict with me since I cut off my hair. It's not fair. It's my hair.

I sigh, there's no turning back now. If I don't come home soon, it will be even more of a reason for Mother to yell at me.

I creaked open the door, trying to gape it as far as I could without making any sounds. Thankfully, Mother wasn't by the front door. I could hear her talking, though. Shit, had she already moved onto the rooms?!

I quickly searched the house, only to find her in the kitchen cooking with Raiden. As I edged near, I saw her snap her head towards me, a distinguished looked on her face.

"Hello, Mother." I greeted her, bowing down in respect. I didn't dare look her in the eyes, instead I kept my eyes on the floor, waiting for her to respond.

"Kunikuzushi." I could catch Mother's shadow do a slight nod in response. Thank the lord, it seemed she wasn't in a bad mood today. "Go do your homework in your room. Don't come downstairs until I say you can." Mother commanded, to which I quickly followed.

It seemed Mother's prioritized thought was to get onto Raiden. This either meant I would have it easier, or harder. I wouldn't have it the same as Raiden. And considering how mother seems to still be mad about my hair, even after years, I'll most likely have it worse.

At least going to my room meant quiet, but there's no doubt I'll hear Mother screaming at Raiden, even from up here. Being in my room also gave me a chance to hide anything I need to, if she hasn't already looked in my room for things to yell at me for.

//-//

Words: 1111

Sorry for the late chapter, twice in a row! I just didn't really know what to write. Sorry if this chapter seems a little rushed. 😭 The next chapter might also be a little late, as I haven't really gotten much idea on what to write. If anyone has any suggestions though, I'm happy to hear them! Thanks for reading so far! ヽ('▽｀)/