Kaisoo: Unattainable Love

18: My Own Distraction

Kai's POV

I was completely miserable for the next few weeks. I didn't have Kyungsoo, I didn't have my happiness. He was avoiding me at all costs, and honestly he still never left my mind.
I needed something to get my mind off of Kyungsoo.. And well, Luhan was that.
Luhan was a little cutie who shared most of my classes. His bubblegum pink hair and bubbly attitude never failed to catch my eye.
It may sound like I have a thing for him, but I don't. He was a good friend, he was pleasant to be around, and he kept my thoughts off Kyungsoo.
And that was all I really needed from someone at the moment.
I told him about the situation, with Kyungsoo and all, he was really the first person in the school to find out the reason behind our recent seperation. Everyone else just thought we'd had a fight or simply broken up, they didn't know the whole story. But Luhan did.
He was the one who comforted me, told me it was going to be okay. He was the one who looked me in the eyes and told me that Kyungsoo just needed time, and that before I knew it I'd have the love of my life back in my arms. He really made me feel a lot better about it all, he gave me some confidence in the situation.
I was happy to have Luhan as my newfound friend, he was what I'd needed for awhile, someone close to me that wasn't Kyungsoo, to help me when me and Kyungsoo had problems, or when I just needed someone besides Kyungsoo to talk to a little while.
I was really starting to feel better about the situation, I was beginning to be a little more optimistic.
But that optimism was only slowly broken down as the days passed.
Seeing Kyungsoo with Suho hurt more than ever. I didn't understand why he was with him. Kyungsoo didn't show any affection or even slight like towards Suho, yet he didn't push him away. It made no sense at all.
I didn't understand what he was trying to do or why he was trying to do it. Ever time he saw me I could see the longing in his eyes, I could see that sad hurt look that told me he didn't like being with Suho. Yet he stayed with him.. I was beyond confused.
But nevertheless, it seemed that for the time being I just needed to five Kyungsoo space, so I did.
Me and Luhan hung out quite a bit. We'd go to the mall after school so he could shop, or we'd go to the movies, or just go to my house and hang out. He was almost like a brother who I'd lost at birth. And I was so glad I'd finally found him.

Kyungsoo's POV

I'm miserable, and I can't do this anymore. I need Kai, I need Kai in my life. I'm giving up on trying to distract myself from it because honestly the distracting is pointless. I'm in love with Kai and I can't do without him.. I need to stop torturing myself by staying with Suho.
These were my exact thoughts as I lie in bed with Suho. He was kissing me, once again. He never seemed to get tired of it, I never really even liked it in the first place.
I felt his hands slip down into my shorts to rest on my bare hips. I was honestly repulsed and disgusted. This needed to stop.
"Stop, stop.. I'm not doing this, I won't," I stated as I scooted away from Suho's grasp. He looked up to me, concerned.
"Why not baby, are you not feeling well? Are you sleepy?" Suho asked, honestly concerned, but I couldn't have cared less.
"No, I just can't do this anymore. This is wrong, all of this. Suho I don't love you, I won't, ever. Go find another playtoy, I need to go," I said as I stood from the bed, grabbing the little bag of my stuff.
"Playtoy?" He asked, tilting his head as he loomed to me. "Kyungsoo you know I car-" I stopped him before he could continue to speak.
"I don't care, if you want me to be happy, leave me alone, okay?" I said before making my way towards the door, and out of his apartment before he could follow me.
I walked down the sidewalk, my feet moving fast, at a near jog.
I didn't know what I was going to say to Kai when I got there, I didn't know if he'd even be hone. But if he wasn't you'd bet I'd wait on his doorstep.
I need Kai.
I've always needed Kai.
I'll always need Kai.
It was clear now, really.
There was no question about it, I needed Kai in my life, and really no stupid thing I did should change that.
Lost in thought, before I knew it I was knocking at Kai's front door, and it seug open, revealing the one person I wanted to see most.
He looked confused.
"Kyungsoo what are you doing he-" Kai was the second person I cut off that evening. I ran up to Kai, immediately looping my arms around him tightly and leaving a lengthy kiss to your lips.
"I'm sorry, I'm so so sorry Kai.. I'm so stupid," I began, speaking in a rushed voice, having a million things he wanted to say at one time. "I need you, I need you Kai I need you a lot and I was stupid not to accept your forgiveness in the first place.. I was just being hardheaded and being hard on myself and I-" I was the one who was cut off this time, by a kiss to my lips.
I looked to Kai, he wore a soft smile on his plump pink lips.
"There's no need to explain love, it's okay.. I understand. I missed you, come on.." He said as he looped an arm at my waist and led me in. He led me to the bedroom and plopped onto the bed, pulling me into his arms and snuggling me lightly.
"Kyungsoo, I love you, I love you more than anything and in always going to be here for you. I don't want to see you making yourself miserable like that ever again.. And I'm ways here to forgive you alright? And you didn't even need to be forgiven for the Suho thing, Soo.. You were in a bad state of mind, you'd thought you'd been cheated on, you were lied to, that wasn't your fault.." Kai said softly as he lightly played with my hair. I nodded my head obediently.
"Never again Jongin, I promise..I was just being naïve and dumb, I'm sorry.." I replied as I lightly nuzzled to his chest. "I love you, I love you more than anything and I never want to be away from you for thar long again.." I whispered softly.

"Never again, angel, I'll never let you go for that long ever again."

//authornim.
I think this chapter sucked idek. I'm sorry for no updates but I had to stay with relatives for 2 weeks and they were literally the most annoying things in the world and gave me no time to update and urgggg, sorry.
anyways, 5k like whaaaaaaaaat.
this story is too pewpy for 5000 people to read it okay?
like wtf world.
/flips table/
no but really, thank you.
and I'm about to fall asleep I'll update other stories tomorrow and goodnight.