It starts like this:
Izuku is chubby. He always has been, no matter what - there is fat on his stomach and his arms are flabby. He has fat on his bones and so does his mother, and yet, nobody else does. The kids at school are rail thin and their arms do not shake, large gaps in their thighs. He doesn't notice, only half-lingering thoughts of envy and awe.
And then he is alone. He weeps his days away and he fails his classes because the bullying has been too much. The atmosphere of a school with people hating him is too stifling, anxiety inducing. His mother enrolls him online when he cannot force himself out the door, crying and hyperventilating because it is terrifying. She relents, only then, because his legs will not move and his mouth cannot form words, merely sobs.
He is enrolled in school and he spirals. He is overweight and he knows, but he can't stop. His stomach is large and his thighs touch and he hates to go outside or look in the mirror. His mother doesn't notice, deny's when he brings it up, and is blissfully ignorant.
Izuku isn't. He hates his body, hates his fingers and his stomach and his thighs and his chin, and everything about him. Just as he always has. He cannot bare to look in the mirror, hates getting dressed because it means he has to see his body.
He is fourteen and his clothes hug him disgustingly tightly.
-
He starts training with All Might. His clothes get looser, fat replaced with muscle, and his body becomes more toned. He is happy with his growing muscles, small as they are. He tries not to think about the fat that still clings to his body like glue. He eats healthier, as well, due to All Might's diet plan.
Really, the man is a Godsend.
But, the slight fat he is losing isn't enough, and so he skips meals.
It's not something progressive, more like suddenly cutting out everything he eats except for dinner with his mother. His stomach growls and it hurts so, so much, but he doesn't cave. He trains on an empty stomach, through the nausea that creeps up his throat. The scale goes down and so do the inches on his waist and thighs, but he is still chubby, somehow. It's not much, and when he is fifteen, he hits a normal weight.
That day is euphoric to him. When he realized that everything paid off in the end, that he can stop torturing himself and finally eat, because that's all he wanted. He wanted to not be overweight, wanted to be healthy and thin or muscular if only the fat wouldnt cling to him so stubbornly.
But..but...but...
--
He gains some of the weight back, ten pounds. He's apathetic to it, not noticing the fat on his thighs. But he notices the jeans he wears make his legs look big, barely a gap between them, and he spirals once more.
--
He is sixteen, now. He has lost that ten pounds he gained back, and more.
He thinks about when he just wanted to be healthy instead of flabby. And now he is. But...
His thighs aren't thin enough. His arms are still flabby, his stomach still bulges outside of his pants sometimes. Maybe he's eating too much again. He cuts back on what he eats, timers on his phone going to 48 hours.
--
School is a struggle. His eyes are heavy and yet he can't sleep. He stares at the math paper in front of him, uncomprehending. His mind is blank and yet filled with static at the same time. He blinks, and the bell is ringing, the teacher collecting his paper.
He didn't know it had been that long. His limbs feel as if bricks have been strapped to him as he gets up, going to lunch. He doesn't eat, the idea not even crossing his mind, instead scrolling on diets online. Hs friends don't talk to him much, and so he lays his head down and shuts his eyes. Sleep does not come that period, the bell ringing all too soon.
YOU ARE READING
ONESHOTS ONESHOTS ONESHOTS !!
FanficA mentally ill person's bnha oneshots !!!! AKA ME !!! AJAXX!!! Yipeee!! please note that these are all angsty !! :P I started this when I was 12 oh no Start date - Sept 11, 2022 ONGOING (forevermore/j)