School bus graveyard one shots

Crying can't change anything - Aiden

+Angst

Requested by- KoyumiKuromi

It had been a while since Aiden celebrated his birthday, and he was typically fine with that.

Maybe it was because he had new friends, real friends this time.

Or maybe it was because his parents finally started to make an effort to show him love and support.

But as Aiden waited, and waited.

He realized this same scenario that had him sitting in his room trying not to feel all those years ago, was repeating.

Aiden's P.O.V

I guess maybe i feel disappointed.

Yeah that's a good word for it.

I feel—extremely let down. my hopes were up.

I mean when it was the twins birthday, everybody knew! Same for Logan, and Ashlyn. Don't even get me started on the party I threw for Ben.

And they all just forget! Am I really that forgettable?

How could Ben even forget about me?.

I can feel my throat get caught and my eyes start to burn. But I'm refusing to cry, I press my hands hard against my head as if to push the tears back.

It stung thinking about it, but somewhere in my gut I knew my old friends still remembered.

Because that was the one time I ever got to celebrate with the people I cared truly about. And then the move happened. I frown deeply remembering how great it felt.

I am sitting at the head of the dining room table.

probably waiting for someone to show up. Anybody really, I didn't care who. In fact! Barron could show up at my front door and I'd give him one of the biggest hugs I could manage.

feeling lonely always made me sad. But growing up moving everywhere and rarely settling down causes you to grow used to it.

I've noticed that I find myself hiding certain details about myself to my new friends, maybe because I feel like we might move again. If we did it's not like I can leave them, with the phantoms and all.

God this is pathetic.

Every time my phone buzzes I think it's somebody congratulating me, for making it past some of the worst years of my life.

I can't cry.

No. I won't cry.

I drop my head into my arms folded on the table, and try to calm my breathing down.

It's just not fair. I pay attention to every little detail about them. I comfort them, I make them laugh, maybe it would be nice to have somebody do that for me.

A while back, I taught myself how to mask my real emotions. I think it's because mom and dad were fed up with me not being the picture perfect child they needed with their reputations.

How shitty is that? Me, a seven year old, trying to make myself feel better. When in reality I was in my room, making fake scenarios, with MY picture perfect family, in my own world.

Taking shaky breaths, I realize I don't want to be here anymore.

I want to run away, I want to scream into the nothing-ness—into a dark abyss where no-one can hurt me.

Slowly, I bring my head up to the small, pastry cake In front of me.

I guess I was stalling to much, the candle wax was dripping onto the cake.

Drawing in a small breath, I blow out my candle.

'I want everything to work out for me. I want nobody to be able to bother me.'

Yeah okay maybe that's a little selfish, but faking who you are for a good decade does some damage.

I feel the tears slide down my face.

Damnit.

I thought I stopped.

Feeling my signature 'phycso' smile spread across my face, I guess I didn't really notice that I was humming my birthday song.

Staring at the dark cake, something inside of me makes my throat close, and I feel rather nauseous. Suddenly I don't feel that hungry anymore.

"Happy birthday to me."

I choke out, wiping my tears with my shoulder.

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Aiden angsts makes me do BACKFLIPS