I just miss to be loved :)

Why would an angel like her would want me?

İt was the new year eve, I was excited because there were just minutes to the new year, but the new year was not the only thing that I was excited about because... because I was finally gonna open my feelings to her, I waited for that moment a whole year, no, no not just 1 year 1...2...3...4 four years!  I was loving her for 4 years like tf. but things didn't gone as well, anyways... I was just a bit excited and was waiting for the moment. and finally, it was the new year! I texted her with all of my feelings,toughts,personality,life lovings,greetings, everything about my life! I texted the message with all of my heart and feelings, after I clicked to that little green arrow, I felt like my stomach came to my mouth, I was about to let them go out, I texted my friend, she comforted me very well, before the...rejection... and after. I felt much well while talking to my friend. and it was finally the respond! I felt like im going to let my stomach out again, I blushed like a tomato and hold my breath. waiting for the response...and I think you guys could understand the response from here... she said "she was not ready and was not thinking about a relationship this year" everything was okay till here, I was feeling a little broken because of the rejection but I could understand her, or I thought there was something to understand... I couldn't sleep that night, thinking of what did I do and texting with my friend. and the things were just okay from there, but the part comes here...