Back in the dark

\\Chapter 1//

⚠️TW⚠️
Mentions of hypersexuality
Mentions of an eating disorder
?Detailed? self harm
Self harm
Narcissistic Parent
Mentions of abortion
Split family
//(Tell me if I missed a warning!!)//

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I don't deal with much bullies, I more or less just sit back in the darkness. I like it there, no one bothers you, or tells you to do something.

I'm in my last year of highschool, I keep up with my grades pretty well and I'm not going to college. Too much money especially in America. Though I do like to animate I do it in my free time at home. I might just start a channel and run that while having a real job.

I don't really plan my future, I just let it come at me.

I look up into the mirror in front of me. My gaze was... Well hurtful. As blood dripped down my legs, arms and wrists.
Tears form in my eyes. I bend down and pull my knees up.

No one was home. It was just me and my horrible feelings. God why the fuck can't I just live normally!?
This is the third time this week. I just can't stop. It's relief. I would go have a "fun time" at the club but no one wants to fuck a boy that looks like he just got shredded.

Thinking about the club mad my feelings worse. Hypersexuality is not a fun thing to have. Yeah sure it's a good feeling in the moment but once your mind clears and you look at what your doing it's a feeling of absolute disgust.

...

My phone buzzed scarring the absolute shit out of me. It was my dad calling. Panicked I answered with a shaky voice.

Dad: Hey I'll be home at 10 ok kido?
*Some relief came over me*
Me: ok dad...
Dad: I love you bye
Me: bye

I have a great relationship with my dad. He's a single dad working two jobs. I have a younger sister that is 12 I don't see her much, Mom has custody of her. Mom's not really a good person. She only cares about "woman" and that men should die.

She only used dad to get pregnant. But when she found out I was a boy she wanted to abort me. My dad disagreed and begged for her to not get one.

When mom got her girl. She had left my dad and took full custody of my sister. We keep in touch a little. If mom ever found out my sis was talking to me she would murder me with her bare hands. What an insane spawn.

I started to clean myself up it was already 9:30 so I had to go fast. Putting bandages over my cuts. Thank goodness it was Winter. It makes it easier to hide it.

10:23

I was watching TV on the couch when I heard the door open. My dad walked through. I got up and quickly hugged him.

"Hey kiddo" he said with a loving voice. "Did you eat?"
I froze
I didn't eat anything for the past 2 days. But I don't want to lie to him to much...
"No, I didn't want to make anything" I replied to him
"Well in that case, I have a few slices of pizza from my job. Want some?" He asks

"I would love that"

A/N// Sorry this was so short it's kinda late and I have school tomorrow. Thanks for reading though! Also Ive been blasting House of balloons on repeat for the past hour 😍//