sweet Beginnings

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DISCORD : MID NOVEMBER 2022

“heyy sienna I'm bored do you have a server where I can troll people maybe?”
“ooh yes hold on”

*anastasia was added to a server by sienna*

“who is this, sienna?”
“this is anastasia!”
“no way!”
“huh?”
“but isn't anastasia super quiet?”
“nah no way this is her, she is somewhat decent atleast”
“this is me, how do I prove it?”
“hm.. who was your bench partner today?”
“henry!”
“oh my god it is you, could have never expected you have two personalities”
“yessir”

the first few days felt so good, it felt like I was entering a new era in my life, with my new friends.

They all matched my vibe so much, each one of them were so stupid and always made me laugh.

JUST A COUPLE DAYS LATER

“hey anastasia, who do you like?”
“hm?”
“do you have a crush on anyone?”
“ehh, no..”
“cmon!! Do you?”
“no.. no one really peaks my interest, I don't know”
“hmm, okay”

that day, I really thought about it.. do I like anyone? I feel like I spent a couple hours brainstorming, to fit in.

I felt like every guy in our class was  not what I would want in a man —

my guy friends, on the other hand..
they matched our personalities alot,
But I was hesitant.
I don't want to ruin our group by liking someone from it..

END OF 2022 (DECEMBER)

“so anastasia, like anyone yet?”
“.... ”
“hellllooo?”
“yes.”
“OH MY GODD let's gooo!! Who who who?”
“i won't tell you hehe”
“tell meee”
“nopee you have to find out”
“uhmm.. hints maybe?”
“sure, ask me a question and I'll answer it?”
“okay!! So, Uhmm.. is he from our class?”
“mhm.. ”
“is he.. in green house?”
“maybe.. ”
“noo you have to tell mee”
“ok fine, he's either from blue or red”
“oh my god ok—”
*Sienna examines the room*
“theres really no red house guys that you could like.. so I'm gonna guess he's from blue.”
*Sienna examines the room one last time*
“ooh— I might know who it isss”
“who?”
“Raymond?”
“nooo”
“uhm give more hints”
“ask away”
“is he tall?”
“kinda.. ”
“do I know him? ”
“yep”
“VERY well or just like I know he exists? ”
“very well.. ”
“okay uhm..”
“aiden..? ”
“ew no”
“shawn and Diego are in yellow so can't be.. ”
“mhm”
“nah I'm convinced it's raymond”
“howw?? ”
“the qualities you said matched him!!”
....

that day, I felt like I started something new, I felt the “spark” of a new something.

Spoiler alert, there was never a spark, I was dumb, immature and people supported my immature acts and nobody stopped me.

I wish I had a time machine so I could go tell myself what he did to me.

DISCORD , SAME DAY

“ANASTASIAAA”
“HMM?? ”
“so you like ray huh??”
“noo”
“yes you do accept it”
“i donttt”
“just say itt I know you do.”
“..”
“HAHAHA knew it”
“LMAO”
“im gonna screenshot this and send to rayy”
“noo sienna what the hell”
“im joking obviously”
“lmfaoo”
“okay well do you know who I like?”
“actually no.. who do you like?”
“guess guess”
“oh my god is it Aiden?”
“ew no he's shorter than me”
“right.. Diego??”
“oop”
“SIENNA OH MY GOD”
“LOL”
“HIMM??”
“honestly I don't know if I like him”

....

this day was exactly what sweet Beginnings means,
Sweet, sweet starts.
Not one single flaw.
Now looking back, I want to rip out my hair.. god was I dumb.

Sometimes we step into something thinking it's gonna be such an amazing start and a fresh base to build up, but then come to realise that it was never all that.

I thought our group would be “different”

But anyways,

Enough of that.
This day was when it all Basically “started”.

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