"You will never be cool." Aeshleighyynn said as she saw Animal Jam on my laptop screen during English class. She was my childhood best friend but we unfortunately started to part when she found out I played Animal Jam. She told everyone in my grade that I was a furry only because I played this game. Unfortunate situation, but this game has taught me so many important life lessons like taxes, classism, and economy.
I shut my laptop and put it in my bag to head out for lunch. As I walked away, ignoring Aeshleighyynn, I heard her say, "What a loser! I bet all she thinks about is trading or something lame." I could not understand why she hated me so much for it, but it did not matter as I was planning to move out of the city soon anyway. As I walked out the classroom door, I blacked out all of a sudden.
I woke up in a daze, confused. "Where am I?" I thought to myself. I looked around and saw that I was still in school, except it was empty. I was all alone for once. I walked down the hallway towards the cafeteria because I was still hungry. Then I saw a shadowy figure by the cafeteria door. I could not make out their face.
"Corn." They said.
"What?" I asked.
"Corn! Remember the corn. Follow the way of the corn. The corn maze will lead you to the truth."
"What?" I asked again because I don't even like corn.
The figure fizzles out like smoke and I blackout again.
I wake up where I blacked out the first time, by the classroom door. Everyone was staring at me. "This is embarrassing," I thought to myself, "but at least it's not as embarrassing as being an Animal Jam scammer." Aeshleighyynn comes over to me to point and laugh. I stand up and head to the cafeteria, because I am still hungry.
In the cafeteria, I was surprised to see very few options of food. Usually we have pizza, pasta, rice, noodles, etc. Today, it was all corn ...? The lunch lady told me that all the ingredients except corn disappeared so the staff made an all-corn menu for the day. I grabbed one corn on the cob and went to eat. I snap it in half to save it for later. As I bit into the corn, I remembered the shadowy figure. "Corn huh?" I said aloud. Aeshleighyynn somehow heard me and said "What a weirdo, I bet you're talking to your furry Animal Jammer friends or something haha!"
I shrug it off and log into Animal Jam to do my Treasure Hunt game. As I logged on, I went into my den and saw a New Jammer waiting. "FURRY!" the New Jammer said, "eat CORN LOSER!" I looked up to see Aeshleighyynn on her phone snickering. I said back, "Aeshleighyynn you are on Animal Jam, does that not make you a 'furry'?" As I sent that message out, I got permanently banned. This is bullshit. What. The. Scallop.
They can call me names. They can scam me. But they can NOT ban me permanently.
I stood up and beat Aeshleighyynn up. Then I decided to go on a journey to storm AJHQ. I ordered an Uber for myself to head home. I packed the essentials and booked a plane ticket to go to Utah. The passion in me has been ignited and I will not rest until my permanent ban is lifted or so help me.
I was lucky enough to get a window seat. I heard the pilot announce that we were flying over Utah and I looked out the window. Lines and lines of crop circles. Cool, but I did not understand what it meant. They were shapes alright.
What I had not expected was seeing an overgrowth of corn wherever I went in Utah. All I could see was the road, some street lamps, and cornstalks. I put "Animal Jam Headquarters" into my GPS and went on my way. It did not seem to be a great idea to rent a car in case corn stalks blocked some paths. Before I knew it, the sun was already setting. I managed to find a convenience store to rest and get some food to recharge.
"New in town?" Asked the clerk.
"Yeah, any advice on getting around fast?" I asked back.
"No."
"Oh, okay."
"Where you headed?"
"Just this company's headquarters."
The clerk gasped.
"What?" I asked again.
"Y-you're going to-" he looks around and lowers his voice, "Animal Jam headquarters?"
"Yeah. Why?"
"Turn back before it's too late. They're already running the state, you think you can face him?"
"You mean the corn is their doing?"
"Not them. Him. But I've said too much, take your items and go."
I grabbed my food and headed out. The corn seems to have grown thicker. As I followed the directions on my GPS, I did not notice a light source in my path. I turned up to look at it, covered by corn stalks. I pushed the corn aside to see a large, floating, glowing corn. I was so intrigued by it, I couldn't stop myself from reaching out to it. As soon as I touched it, a loud voice boomed.
"WHO GOES THERE?"
A shadowy figure spawns in front of me. I remember, it is the same one I saw when I blacked out at school.
"Who are you?" I reach out to the figure.
"I am who you seek. I am the truth. Clank Stanckey."
"YOU'RE THE CLANK STANCKEY??"
"Yes. I'm here to tell you that permanently banned accounts cannot be recovered. Get good, kid."
I start to cry because my fucking rares bro I worked hard for them what the hell man. Before I knew it, I punched his face. I punched Clank Stanckey. I don't care anymore. I lost my forest gauntlets, my favourite party favour items, my blackout spike. I lost everything. I have nothing to lose.
Mr. Stanckey took my punches like they were nothing. He stopped my next punch and threw it back at me.
"YOU DARE ATTACK ME? DO YOU UNDERSTAND THE POSITION YOU ARE IN?"
He starts to metamorphosize. But he looked like a corn. After shaking out and about, he frees himself of the corn cocoon. He is now green and very buff. I felt fear for the very first time. It looks like he has transcended his human form after taking in corn energy.
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"GLEEPR GLORP!!!!" He yells.
I was not going to stand around and ask "What?" like a dumbass. I ran for my life.
"GLIMP ZONG GLER BIM!!!" He shot green rays out of his eyes.
I managed to avoid the first few, but he landed a hit on the back of my head. I feel myself changing. I am surrounded by corn. I only see corn. And I am only left with one thought.
