Belle (updated)

proud

•KILLIAN

I wake up with my angel still sleeping soundly on top of me

last night was the best night of my life

I and Belle said 'I love you'

we had sex for the first time

I feel closer to her than ever

I'm truly happy

I don't know what I did to deserve my baby but whatever it was, I couldn't be more grateful

I lay still just looking down at my girl lying peacefully on my bare, tattoo-covered chest as I think about how perfect she is

this girl could rip my heart out of my chest, stomp on it and drain my soul and I would come crawling back to her, begging for her forgiveness

I'm obsessed

I'm so needy for her it's toxic

and i don't care

i need her to live

to breathe

to be happy

to be calm

she stirs in my arms and whimpers softly as she scrunches her cute little nose before blinking her eyes open

she rubs her eyes using her fists, with a pout on her lips

my angel

her hair is messy and her skin glowy

she looks ethereal

a goddess

"hi baby," I say softly as I move my hand under her fluffy white hoodie and rub her back

she looks at me and smiles flinging her arms around my neck and laying her head on my shoulder

"hi killy" she says happily with a smile on her pretty face

i can't cope

i need her closer to me

but it's not fucking possible

I move us onto our sides and push her hoodie up to just below her boobs so that I can feel her again me and stuff my face into her neck, taking in her scent as she plays with my hair

I hum in contentment wishing I could stay here for the rest of my life

wishing I could die like this, I'd die a happy man not caring whether I went to heaven or hell

but of course my phone rings

I practically cry as I sit back up, pulling Belle up onto my lap sideways

I pick up my phone as she traces my tattoos

I lean her head against hers kissing her temple

i answer the call

"yes?" i say irritated

"Is this Killian Edris?" the voice from the other end asks

"yes" i say again

"I was told I would be able to reach Belize here.. is she with you" he asks

I furrow my eyebrows "What's this about?"

"I'm-" he sighs "I'm her father"

my eyes widen, she's never spoken about her father or her mother or anything from before she was with John and Sarah

"what do you want?" I ask

"I just- I just want to see her.. meet her. hopefully" he sighs

"I'll talk to her, don't expect anything," I tell him, hanging up before he can reply

I look down at the sweet little angel, engrossed in following the lines of my tattoos with her dainty finger

"sweetheart" I call gently "your father just called me-"

her eyes widen slightly before her eyebrows furrow

"he wants to meet you," I say gently

"No"

"I know but-"

"There's no 'but's'. I have no father Killian, it will stay that way"

I sigh "its your decision, I will agree with whatever you choose"

"Thank you" she kisses my jaw

"What happened with your mom baby?"

she turns tense in my arms

"um.. my dad left my mom when he found out she was pregnant but she had me anyway, we were really poor so she became a stripper to pay for us and I waited in the dressing room because she couldn't afford childcare. One night when we were walking home a man grabbed me but my mom forced him off and told me to run so I did, I heard her screaming and then a gunshot and then it was all quiet, after that, I was fostered by John and Sarah," she tells me quietly

"I'm so sorry princess"

"there's nothing I can do now" she shrugs

"I know but I am proud of you"

she goes rigid and turns to me with tears in her eyes

"Really?" she asks just above a whisper

I nod with a smile "I'm so proud of you baby"

tears roll down her cheeks

"why are you crying princess" I ask softly as I while her tears

"no one has ever said they were proud of me before"

my heart melts

"I'm always proud of you angel, everyday" I push some hair behind her ears

she puts her head leaning against my chest as I hold her small body as if she could break

"I love you" she sniffles

i sigh happily

those words I would kill for

"I love you so much baby" I kiss her head "So much"

we stay there for a minute or two before the comfortable silence is interrupted by a sweet voice

"I want a brownie"