Jerksville

Jerksville-HTFIL One Shot

My hand shook as I reached out to turn off the blaring sound coming from my phone. There wasn't even a point of setting my alarm anymore. I hadn't slept properly in days. Seven to be exact. One whole week without the most important person in my life. Mia.
It had been a week since I told her everything. How I wasn't ready for our relationship, or her love. How I wanted to heal myself, complete myself before I could even think of being with her. Most importantly though, how I wanted her to put her dreams before my happiness. I had told her everything.
My soul was bared to her and that's when I choose to leave. Her heartbroken expression had been too much for me as I saw it dawn on her that I was giving up. That I wasn't fighting for us. But I was, just not in her sense anyway.
For the past seven days, I had been miserable. The only thing making me go to work was the crisis left after Genesis. Thank God Mia had figured out their plan before it was too late. If not, the whole company would've collapsed. I don't know what I would've done.
But today was already Thursday. I had spent seven days without seeing Mia. My resolve was slowly breaking, along with my heart. It yearned for Mia. Her warm touch. Her feisty attitude. Her ability for me to become myself. I missed it all.
I slowly got out of bed and into my normal black tux. As I put it on, I smiled sadly. This was the tux Mia had spilt coffee on at Macey's. The one that had stuck to my legs as burning hot coffee slowly seeped in and scalded me. The one that I should have thrown away but instead, I choose to get it dry cleaned. All because of one person.
I methodically went through the motions of getting ready. Forcing myself to eat some cereal, I called Roderick. I was in no fit state to drive.
"Roderick. I need you to pick me up. I'm at the mansion."
I hung up straight away, not leaving any time for stupid words to express my gratitude. I didn't need to thank people. It was what they were paid to do. But why did Mia always make me feel guilty when I didn't do it? Why did she try to change that about me?
A sharp knock on the door drew me out of my daze and I grabbed my phone before leaving the house.

We arrived at Laurel Tech in thirty minutes. Traffic had been light, surprising for New York.
I solemnly slipped out of the car and headed towards the building. The guards let me in without any hesitation and I made my way towards the sleek elevator en route to level twenty.
As soon as it stopped, I hurried into my office, dying to be away from the inquisitive glances and stares that I had been thrown since Monday. My employees could all see the dark bags under my eyes, the fact that my suits were too loose for me. They knew something was going on, I just hoped they didn't know what.
I stepped into my office and hesitated. It was no longer the same. It hadn't been since Mia left. I could see the couch where we had had our bonding chat, where I had finally admitted to myself that I actually liked her.
I slowly creeped forward and was instantly brought back to the first time she came here. She fixed the virus. And I had been so cruel. And then she started crying. God when she cried she was beautiful. Her skin was flushed, her eyes were wide and sparkling with emotion and her lashes were dripping with moisture. And her lips. Oh God. They were full and red and so kissable.
My chest was hurting and I couldn't take it anymore. I strode over to my desk and kicked it over. Then I pushed the office chair and knocked my lamp down. With every destructive move I made, I became angrier and angrier. I was such an idiot. Asshole. Monster. Jerk. All perfectly good ways of describing my despicable behaviour to the only person I'd ever loved. The only person I would ever love. The only person that loved me for me.
I stormed into the bathroom and all I could see was my reflection everywhere. Of this worthless creature. It was too much and I punched the mirror in rage, wanting the pain to stop.
"Fuck!" I screamed.
I slowly slumped to the ground and began to cry. The emotions had been slowly building up and I was finally releasing them.
The cries of anguish were wrecking through my body as I sobbed into my hands. The pain was slowly taking over my whole body, spreading outwards from my heart.
Mia. God I missed her so much. She was just perfect. And I didn't even get to tell her I loved her. I was such a jerk to her. Just thinking about her made me cry even more. I would probably never see her again.
"Mr.Laurel?"
A particularly feminine voice called my name and my head whipped up at the sound of it. My eyes were blurry as I tried to locate the sound of the voice. It was Artemis. Her blouse and skirt were too tight, as usual and her make-up was too heavy. I used to think it was sexy, but then I met Mia. She didn't wear any make-up and she always looked stunning. Dammit I was thinking about her again!
"What do you want?" I croaked out. Artemis was staring at me with a horrified expression on her face. She opened her mouth to say something but closed it again.
"What do you want?!" I screamed at her, my voice cracking at the end.
She slowly walked away before turning around and running out.
I put my head onto my knees and continued bawling. The pain was just too much. I can't believe I left her. I was such an idiot.
"Finn?"
My head slowly creeped up again. I swear, if that's Artemis then I'm going to scream.
My eyes focused on Alex. Shit. What was he doing here.
"What are you doing here?" I croaked out. "I thought you went after Claudette?"
Alex smiled softly, his eyes lighting up and I hated it. He was happy and in love with his girl, and I wasn't. It pained me to see.
"I did. It took me a day to find her and when I did, I sat her down and told her everything. She ran off but I was persistent. I didn't give up. After a week she called me. We had wild make up sex, man it was the best sex I've ever had. Then I came back to New York two days ago," he said, while trying to look nonchalant, but I could see the triumph and love in his eyes. He finally got her. After all this time.
"But now is not the time to talk about me. What the fuck is wrong with you man? Everyone's talking about you, everywhere I go. Artemis just came running into my office saying you were having a panic attack or something. Your hand is bleeding and your office is ruined. And there's a crack in your mirror. What's wrong?" he questioned, while kneeling down beside me.
"I-I messed up man. I ended it with M-her," I stuttered. I couldn't even bring myself to say her name. I was pathetic.
"What?! Why?!" Alex exclaimed and I drew away. His voice was too loud for my broken self.
"She doesn't deserve me. I'm a mess. I would only hold her back. She wants to be a writer. I want her to follow her dream. If she's happy than I'm happy. But I've completely deleted her from my life and I hate it! I miss her so much," I shouted and broke down into tears again.
"Alright man. Come on. Let's take you to the hospital to get your hand stitched up."
Alex gently lifted me up and supported me with his body. He grabbed my phone out of my pocket and rang someone.
"Roderick? Ya its Alex. Listen, I need you to come to the back entrance of the building. We've got a situation," he said into the phone before hanging up.

We arrived at the hospital in twenty minutes and I was seen within five. The perks of being CEO of Laurel Tech. My hand was numbed before they quickly stitched up the deep gash. It was then covered in a bandage and I was given painkillers for when the numbness wore off.
Alex had been silent the whole time I was getting stitches. He seemed to be deep in thought about something and it was annoying the hell out of me. It wasn't until we were leaving the hospital that he spoke again.
"You shouldn't have done that," he muttered to himself but I heard him anyway. He could've been talking about anything but I knew exactly what he meant.
"I know that now."
"She loved you Finn. She really did," he said, while looking me straight in the eyes and I could see the sincerity in them.
I couldn't handle it anymore and looked away. It was then that I saw a familiar figure. Leonardo. Mia's mother's partner. The one who paid for her funeral. My only remaining link with Mia.
I suddenly jumped off my seat and ran towards him. When I was around a metre away, I stood and composed myself, taking deep breaths in.
"Mr.Dickinson," I called out and watched him look around in confusion before turning around completely.
His face lit up in recognition and I took that as a sign to come closer. As I approached him, I noticed the dark bags under his eyes. His skin was pale and his hair was lifeless. His doctors coat was too big on him, as if he had lost some weight. He was obviously taking the death of Mia's mother badly. He looked the same as I did. We had both lost someone important. But at least I had a chance. My girl was still alive. Unfortunately, his wasn't.
I cleared my throat before speaking.
"Sir, how are you?"
He heaved a sigh before replying, "Honestly, not great. I'm not able to sleep properly. I've lost my appetite. I'm about to burst into tears whenever I see something that reminds me of her."
The way he described himself was exactly the way I was.
"And Mia," I managed to get out.
"I'm not sure to be honest," he mumbled.
My eyes widened.
"You don't know?"
"No I haven't talked to her since she left."
It felt like my heart stopped.
"She left," I stuttered out. Oh please God, let him be joking. She can't have left me. I need her. Leonardo looked surprised.
"She didn't tell you?"
I shook my head sadly.
"Well, shes gone to a creative writing course in Birmingham. I think her mum gave it to her but I'm not too sure. She's planning to go there for six months and then move into her mums old apartment. I would've thought she would've told you," he muttered the last part to himself and shook his head.
I couldn't hear anything. Mia had gone. She wasn't even in the continent. She didn't want to fight for us. I couldn't blame here, I hadn't tried. She needed someone strong. Even though she was feisty, she was fragile. She had been because of her dads death. More so now after her mums recent passing. But I wasn't strong enough for her at the moment. I had my own battles to face. But as soon as I was healed, I promise you Mia, I will fight for us.
'Mr.Laurel?'
A faint voice buzzed in the distance but I stood strong, with my head held high and my shoulders back and turned and walked away.
Mia my love, I swear I will fight for us. Someday.