Shouldve been us (bk. 3 of Things I'll never say)

chapter one : lay me down

Ayenne's POV*
first day of school... *sigh*

Could you imagine that summer is over? It's so annoying how summer just visits for 3 months then just goes away being replaced by a deadly torture called school?

*take a deep breath. Inhale. Exhale*

This time, I'm not falling for any boy just like I used to.

Where's IV-kindness?????????????????

Ughh finally, it was just down this hall?! Wtf?!

Woahhh I got some huge classmates.. Or tiny.. Or medium.. Or...... whatever they were mixed up anyways

I was greeted inside by Bea which is my old classmate back in third grade and we sat down next to each other not really wanting to face everybody else.. That'll just be awkward and weird being the first one to start a convo

*after 2 hours which seemed like forever*

FINALLY LUNCH!!!

Soooooooooo time to walk down alone and meet up with Nika and Rio in the canteen. Can't you believe? Rio is in IV-Generosity, Nika is in IV-Charity and I'm in IV-Kindness ??

Like, one whole world divided to three?

aaaaaaaaaaanyways, *going down*
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Oh fuck.
Him.
Everything. It's all back.
The feelings.
The thoughts.
The image of him hurting me by his words.
And the amazing times when we used to make jokes with our groupmates and laugh about it all together.
We're never alone, but I love everything when he's involved in it.
Seeing him makes myself think that he's never done anything wrong.
_
I stared at you. You stared back.

Suddenly, all of the nerves inside me popped up

I stood right up and walked as fast as I could to the canteen to buy food and search for those two probably playing around only with his image still in my head

Here they go..... just like I said..... playing around.

If you ask, "Does Riona still like Bryan?" to answer that, no.

She threw him away just like an iPhone 5c being replaced with an iPhone 6+

JP. She replaced him with JP.

And it hurts to see him being hurt like that.

I hate how I gave way and didn't confront with her about her liking him before because I like him too. A lot.

And now, she's just gonna call me up and say "I don't like B anymore, I like JP better, way awesome-r"

I wish I could come up to him and say that I like him. But I can't. Because I know it wouldn't help anyways. He doesn't like me.

Nobody likes me.

Everybody likes Riona better. Or Nika better.

I have friends because im the one who came up to them and started talking.

But Rio is like a magnet that pulls other people towards her, even the people who she doesn't like, likes her.

She's skinnier, prettier, funnier, nicer, and everything a boy would want in a girl.

And I would trade my life just to experience that for just a day. That's how desperate I am to either stand out or vanish in the world

Stay put. Just stay put, Ayenne.

*dismissal*

**************song line theme:**************
" we keep this love in a photograph, we make these memories for ourselves." Photograph Ed Sheeran