The Confessions of a GHG (Unfinished, writing chapter by chapter)

Prologue

January 14, 2013 - Washington, DC

Lexi looked into the mirror, the bruises staring back at her accusingly. "How did it come to this?", she asked herself, "How did I let this happen? When did I become this person?" Tears streamed down her cheeks as she reached for her cell phone. It was finally time to call her sister and tell her the truth about her marriage, her life.

Chapter 1

May 11th, 2001- Beaumont, MS

Happy 13th Birthday, Alexandra Grace Potter!! The banner across the living room was beautiful, well colorful at least. Lexi's younger siblings had done an amazing job of painting her birthday sign, and at getting every color possible into it. Even baby Joe had managed some bright red hand-prints across the middle of the artwork.

"Happy Birthday Lexi!", 11 year old Christiana exclaimed throwing her arms around her sister, "Do you feel all grown up now that you're a woooman?" she teased. Lexi pushed her a little, "No silly, I just feel... the same? Everything is always The Same." Christi looked crestfallen, so Lexi immediately hugged her "I'm just having a bad attitude. The banner is beautiful and I'm so happy y'all put together this party for me. I am sure it will be a lovely day." Christi brightened and ran off to check on lunch.

Lexi went outside and flounced on the porch swing waiting for her "guests" to arrive. "You'd think I'd be able to have an actual birthday party, but nooo, I'm not SPECIAL enough for that!" Lexi grumbled to herself. "Family are the closest friends you'll ever have", Daddy had said when she'd approached him about having some of the kids from church over for her birthday. So, she sat here waiting for her grandparents,Nana and Gramps, to arrive. As she sat there moping, she saw a familiar face ride up to the front gate on a blue bicycle. She quickly smoothed her hair, straightened her denim skirt, and skipped down the walkway. "Jackson Hughes! What are you doin' all the way out here??" She asked with her most grown-up and sweetest voice she could muster. "Hey Toadstool!! SOMEONE told me that it's your birthday, the big 1-3, and I just wanted to give you something I made to commemorate this momentous occasion!", he said with a huge grin as he opened the gate and handed her a brown paper bag. "OH You!!", she said smacking him, "You know how I HATE that dreadful nickname. Why do you always have to be such a...a...JERK?" Then, she recalled the bag in her hands and she tried to retain her dignity. "Won't you come and sit on the porch? Would you like some iced tea? I just made it this morning." Jackson laughed and pinched her cheek, "You know that name fits you, and no, as much as I would like to stay I have a lot of schoolwork to get done, and I think your father wouldn't exactly approve of me being here. But, open the bag!!" Lexi opened the bag as daintily as she could and to her horror inside was a hunk of WOOD! As she pulled it out she saw it got even worse, it was a hunk of wood carved and painted to look like a mushroom! "What the....WHAT IS THIS???" She said with disgust, "You did NOT just give me a toadstool for my birthday!! Get OUT of here Jackson Hughes!! Of all of the mean, selfish, hateful things to do to a girl. I HATE YOU!! I HATE YOU!!!" She screamed throwing it at his head, as she ran into the house crying.

Lexi ran into the room she shared with her sisters and fell onto her bed sobbing. She thought back to the day she had met Jackson Hughes...the day she had known he was the man she wanted to spend the rest of her life loving.

Chapter 2

April 12th, 1998 - Beaumont Baptist Church

"Daddy, I am SOOOO SORRY!! I didn't MEAN to laugh, it, just - ouch! Daddy pleeeease..." Lexi sobbed as her father's hand clamped tighter onto her neck as he marched her behind the church building. She had been sitting, minding her own business, as Pastor Higgins preached on and on, when her friend Hannah silently leaned over the pew and handed her a picture she had been drawing. It was actually a VERY good caricature of Pastor Higgins, even down to the way his nose turned all red and there was some spittle flying out of his mouth. Lexi couldn't help it she just burst out laughing. Which of course made everyone look at her...and the picture in her hands! Daddy had immediately stood up from his place at the end of the pew and motioned for her to follow. She had started crying before she even got to the door, knowing what was coming. Now Daddy shoved her towards the picnic area at the back of the church and told her "Get a good one, girl." She could barely see she was sobbing so hard, but she also knew if she delayed at all it would be even worse on her. She silently took Daddy's outstretched pocket knife, found a long, supple lower branch, cut it off, and handed it to Daddy. He trimmed off the knots and bumps and told her to lift her skirt so that just her legs were showing and lean over the picnic table nearest to them. Trembling she obeyed quickly, and then just waited. Daddy did not begin right away. Swish-swish Lexi could hear him swinging the switch through the air as he began to lecture. "Alexandra, you have disgraced our family and more importantly you have disgraced The Lord with your blatant disrespect -" "But, Daddy, it wasn't AAAH" Fire sliced across her thighs as Daddy brought the switch down hard. "You will NOT interrupt me, Alexandra Grace! I am speaking and YOU will stay silent. Also, because of our location you will not scream or cry like a baby as someone might hear you. You will be silent and take this like the young woman that you are, or rather that you should be. Now, like I was saying you have shown disrespect to me, to our brothers and sisters in the church, and to God. And for that you must be chastised. Once I say we are done you will silently follow me back into the sanctuary and you will not make any noise or indicators that you are in disgrace. I do not want you seeking pity from anyone. Once the service has ended you will sit in the car whilst the rest of us enjoy the potluck. Once we return home you will go directly to bed. Do you understand??" "Yes S-s-sir." She managed to get out before he began to rain down blows upon her thighs, calves, and the backs of her knees. She held back as much as she could, but she couldn't stop the tears and snot from dripping down her face. After about 20 blows he tossed the switch and said "You have 30 seconds to compose yourself, Alexandra, and then we will walk back into the sanctuary together." Lexi nodded. Doing the best she could Lexi violently wiped at her eyes and face trying to stop the flow. Once she felt somewhat composed she stiffly followed her father. Every step felt like he was striking her again at the welts began to pull at her skin. Just as they were walking around the corner of the church a handsome young man with light brown hair and piercing blue eyes came racing up from the parking lot and knocked her flat on her throbbing backside. He dropped a diaper bag and everything in it went flying. As Lexi scrambled to get up, at the same time trying to help him gather his belongings, the boy leaned over as if to pick up the diapers, "Are you okay?" he whispered. Lexi's eyes got huge, He KNEW? She gave one nod, hoping her father didn't notice. As Lexi scrambled up and the boy got the last of his possessions in order her father looked at him accusingly and said "Hello Young Man, I don't recognize you. Why are you not in the service??" "Hello Sir.", the boy replied sticking out his hand, shaking his hand tightly, and looking into her father's eyes with confidence. "My name is Jackson Hughes. My family just moved to the area and this is our first Sunday visiting your fine church. Mama forgot the diaper bag and my baby sister Maggie is in dire need of it." He winked at Lexi. "I am SO sorry to have knocked you over, and I hope to be able to apologize more fully later, but Mama really does need these diapers." He held the door as they walked into the church, firmly placing something into Lexi's hand as she walked past. Quickly glancing down, Lexi realized it was a handkerchief monogrammed with the initials J.D.H.