LIFE WITH NO HAPPINESS

On February 23, 2024, I woke up from my nap at 7:20 AM. My father scolded me and looked very upset because the house was so messy. He blamed it all on me, saying that I was the one who made this mess and I should clean it. I replied that I hadn't noticed it and questioned how I could clean it if I hadn't noticed the mess. However, he didn't listen or consider my point of view. He kept blaming me for all the mess in the house, while I kept defending myself because I knew that what I was saying was true. I had just woken up, while my siblings were already awake at that time. There were messy tables, clothes everywhere, books, and notebooks scattered around. He didn't care because he had his favorite child. I frequently feel left behind by my friends, schoolmates, and family members. I always end up alone, without value to those I love and need the most.They're just hurting me until I give up. What do they want me to do? Pull myself to the decision that sometimes I want to do is to die, or trigger my anxiety and depression to kill me. I don't know why they're always mean to me, they always blame me and keep blaming. That's why sometimes I don't blame myself if I decided just to kill myself. I don't blame myself if I become the most demonic and evil in your eyes. If that time comes, don't blame me why I've come to an unfortunate decision like this.