Redemption

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The next morning Kate awoke in her bed....alone....to the sound of her phone ringing, over and over. Without even looking to see who it was on the other end she simply silenced it. She didn't want to talk to anyone...today...she just wanted to process...and cry. She loved Loki, more than she had ever loved any man only to find out that he hadn't been truthful with her. It hurt, it hurt deep. Tears welled up in her eyes and she let them fall like rain. How could she be so stupid? How could she always just take him at his word ever again? He was a God who knew magic after all, maybe he put her under a spell? Her mind raced as countless possibilities of why everything happened made their way into her conscience thoughts. Her phone alerted her that she had received a text message:

"Kate, this is Thor. I tried to call you to make sure you're ok, but missed you. How are you doing? Are you ok"?

How should I be she thought? How does he think I am? And why does he even care?

"I'm fine Thor, thanks for checking on me". She sent back, sure that he had done this at Loki's request.

Never had she ever been so furious as she was when she thought about the events of the past 12 hours. He didn't have to just lie to her for her to be angry with him, but the fact that he lied by omitting the truth, was more than she could bear. She had been so completely honest with him, so honest that she had told him her deepest secrets in no time at all. She spent the day in a haze, wondering from room to room, until sleep was the only place her mind and heart found solace.

Loki, struggled with guilt for not coming completely clean to Kate. Could she or would she ever forgive him. Thor found him on the roof of their apartment building lost in his own thoughts. "Loki, I checked on her and she is ok", he told him solemnly. "You know,, I begged you not to do this, I already knew the outcome", he said, almost scolding Loki for not listening to him after he had pleaded with him to not just go without him. And now he wasn't sure if Loki heard him because if he did, he didn't acknowledge what Thor had said. "Loki, did you hear me", he asked. "Yes, Thor, I heard you, but right now, this day, is not the time to talk about this, he said. "Thank you for checking on her, I must talk to her, I have got to make this right with her", he said, his voice trembling as tears welled in his eyes. "Loki, for once listen to me this time", he started, "give Kate some space to just figure all of this out, I'm sure she will talk to you when she's ready". Loki nodded his head in agreement this time. "Thor, would you do something for me" he asked. "Anything Loki, you know I am here for you", he assured him. "Will you please talk to her and explain things to her, she trusts you and I know she will listen to you", he pleaded. Thor was very hesitant about getting in the middle of their affairs, but he understood why Loki asked him. "Loki, when the time comes, I think it's best that she hear everything from you", he said, hoping his brother understood that he loved them both. Loki just looked at him as if he was soaking up his words slowly like a sponge. "Sure Thor, you're right, this is my mess to clean up and mine alone", he said, unsure if he would ever fix this.

Loki had done his fair share of horrible things, caused wars, almost destroyed an entire city, tried to kill Thor many times....and thought nothing of it. He had no remorse for any of it. But this, Kate, was on such a different realm of destruction for him. He hated himself...probably more than Kate...at this moment. How could he love her so deeply and not been truthful with her? Did he even know how to love at all, he wondered. He finally fell asleep, but his dreams haunted him. Over and over the look on Kate's face when he told her the truth taunted him. He made himself wake from the fitful sleep to find the sun rising in the sky. It's beautiful pink and gold colors dancing with the clouds as the golden orb slowly rose above the tall buildings. He made his way back to the apartment to find Thor sitting by the window, staring out onto the people, cars and buses below.

"Thor I must talk to her today", Loki said in a panic as he grabbed his jacket and headed out the door with Thor close behind. "Loki, stop, NOW", he bellowed. "I told you to give Kate space and that she'll call when she's ready, I know this and you should too". "Kate loves you, you should be able to feel that". Loki, turned around looking at Thor. He knew he was right. he had made such a mess of things. "Loki, I will go see her today if she will let me, if that will keep you here", he assured Loki. "Would you, please Thor, I need her to know that I never meant for any of this to happen", Loki said, his voice shaking and the tears welling in his eyes. I will text her and find out, you do know that this may not work for her, right, Thor said, with his phone in his hand.

"Kate, I would like to come over today, are you available"?

Kate looked at her phone, "Thor again", she said in a huff, rolling her eyes.

"What's up, not really up to seeing anyone today, I hope you understand ", she sent back.

She had busied herself putting everything that reminded her of Loki in a box and placed it in the back of her closet. "Out of sight, out of mind", she told herself. Even though that turned out to be a lie, he was all she could think about.

"I would really like to talk to you", Thor replied

"About what? Your brother's lies?" she shot back.

"I know his actions haven't been honorable. But I assure you his intentions for taking you back to Asgard under the current circumstances harbored no malice", he replied.

She read the text over and over, if there was anything she knew for sure, it was that Thor would be truthful.

"Ok, I'll be available later today", she replied.

Thor assured Loki, she would see him later that day and he would do his best to help turn things around. "Loki, I can't fix everything, I hope you understand that, he said. "I know Thor, but at least let her know I love her and when she's ready, I'll explain everything ", Loki said. He was finding it hard to breathe knowing that redemption with Kate was closer.

Later that day Thor arrived at Kate's home. Kate told herself to be strong, open-minded, and listen to him. Their conversation was long, full of questions and answers, some very complex. "Kate, you know he loves you and he's going crazy wanting to talk to you and fix this". Thor assured her. "Ok Thor, ok", she lamented, "I'll call him", she said. "I'm not sure what to say to him though", she said, she was torn between confusion, anger and hurt. She understood why Loki did what he did, but she had questions that needed answers and only Loki could provide them. "Thank you Thor, for coming over, you have helped me to understand so much about Loki, things he never told me about himself", she said, hugging Thor before he left.

Her mind swirled with so many Why's? Hesitantly, her hand trembling, she picked up her phone, staring at his phone number. For the first time, in all the time, she had known Loki, she found herself afraid to call him. "You can do this Kate, you can do this", she kept telling herself.

"Hello, Loki?"

Heaven Only Knows
By: Richard Marx

I watch the world go round and round
And my life goes by at the speed of sound
I walk the night and I wonder just where I belong, oh

My heart is young but my soul is old
I've never been one to do as I was told
My back to the wall is the only place I can feel strong, oh

Heaven only knows what lies before me
Heaven only knows what all my searching is for
All my life, I've waited for a miracle
But I can't ask for anything more

I like to think I'm a faithful man
To resist desire and do all I can
I hope to die in the arms of the woman that I love, oh

Heaven only knows what lies before me
Heaven only knows what all my searching is for, oh
All my life, I've waited for a miracle
But I can't ask for anything more, no more

I've always wondered how to know right from wrong
Looking for a reason to replace what is gone
But somehow the road just seems to lead right back to me, to me

Heaven only knows what lies before me
Heaven only knows what all my searching is for
All my life, I've waited for a miracle
But I can't ask for anything more

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