The Girl Who Wanted Love

I'd like to note, that when words are in between * it's Kristina talking. When Grace is talking and there's a ', she is talking to Kristina in her head.

Prologue:

How would you like to have been the girl with the father issues? The girl with the mother who didn't care? The girl who used matches to burn holes in her skin? The girl who just wanted to be loved? The girl who had hallucinations and would talk to herself for hours inside of her head?

Kristina, was her other self, the one who always had the extra comment, the one inside Grace Cavner's head anyway.

This is based off of a true person but the names have been changed for the privacy of her, and her loved ones. Most parts of the story are fiction as to make sense of the horrors of Grace's true life and real character.

Chapter One:

I had never felt so alone. My father hasn't called me in over a month, my mother was out with her new husband, James, again and all of my friends were out... Oh wait, I don't really have friends.

"What to do, what to do?" I sighed and flopped down onto on bed. My phone beeped just as I hit the bed.

"Hullo?" *Who the hell would call me? Must be a prank.*

"Hey, is this Grace Cavner?" A male voice, young.

"It all depends on who is asking." *Sly, real sly, watch it will be a cop!*

"It's Cody, Cody Stine." His voice became nervous, as if he felt forgotten.

"Oh! Hey! How'd you get my number?" *You know it's a trick, that douche hasn't called you since that kiss on the beach.* 'Shut up, Kristina!'

I heard the distinct hush and tinkle of laughter, trying to be muffled.

"Well, I wanted to call but I had a lot of issues going on and then I broke my phone." *Yeah, right. Broken cell phone, totally and completely trustworthy.*

"Oh, it's fine Trevor. Stop being such an asshole and leave me the fuck alone, okay?" I said it innocently, trying to irritate him further.

"How... What?" Trevor stuttered as his mind filled with disbelief that Grace had caught him. I hung-up on him.

"Jackass." I muttered. "Well Kristina, you wanna go for a walk in the park? It's better than staying here all night, and maybe we'll get kidnapped and taken to a fantasy world be a unicorn!" *I'd rather it be a Centaur.* "You're such a downer."

As I passed my full-length mirror I stopped. I looked at myself for a minute. Black hair, pale skin, dimples, neat eyebrows, and odd blue, almost white eyes.

*You better get dressed into something nicer than that, you do remember that you have that blind date tonight, right?*

"Shit!" I rushed to my closet and grabbed the red and black mini-dress my friend, Casey, had gotten me. I grabbed my high-top Converse, and fishnet tights.

I didn't have time for a shower now, oh well. I slipped on my outfit and brushed my hair and teeth. I coated my eyes with thick-black eyeliner and mascara, dabbing a sparkly white eyeshadow on top. I added my usual black lipstick to my full lips and I was done.

I remembered the chain necklace I had gotten from my mystery date and clasped it to my neck. I slipped gauges into my ears and dashed for my car keys, purse and phone.

I started my car and rushed to the dance club that my Mr. Mystery-Man told me to meet him at.

"Hi, I'm looking for a guy named Jay Monroe, did he ask for me?" I asked the young girl at the counter where Jay, said to meet him.

"In fact, yes there was. He is... Right over there!" The girl pointed me to a table where lights didn't wander. *Creepy, Mr. Jay over there, set up a setting that looks like he's gonna rape you.*

'Shut it Kristina, you know how I much I hate rape jokes.' As I true to summer down from Kristina's disturbing comments, I had already reached his table.

"Jay Monroe?" I fluttered my eye lashes as the boy turned to me.

"I am. You don't happen to be Grace Cavner, do you?" I could only make out minor contours of his face from the shadows.

"I am actually. First time I'm glad to be her." I giggled and he chuckled.

"Oh! Please, have a seat." He pulled the chair out for me, which no one had ever done.

"Thank you very much." I blushed, I ha a feeling that tonight might just be good

Chapter 2:

I awoke with a indescribable pain in my head. For a second I had to try to recollect the memories from the previous nights events but I quickly remembered.

I had come home, where my mother and her husband were pacing back and forth.

"Where the fuck have you been?!" My mother yelled. *God, I hate it when that bitch acts like she cares.*

"I was out on a date, Mom." I said calmly, and cool. I didn't want her to know I had a fun time.

She stomped over to me and grabbed me by my long hair. She brought her hand back and slapped me so hard I felt the inside of my cheek bleed.

"Don't sass me, Miss!" She had obviously been drinking. She threw me to the floor and her new husband, James walked over to me.

"Grace, you may not be use to having rules but now that I'm here, you are going to listen to me!" He punched me several times and then started to take my dress off.

I kicked and screamed but my own mother held me down and laughed as James went inside me and ripped through my virginity.

I cried and cried, I even screamed but by now the neighbors were used to it and didn't think anything of my screams. I had become so tired after the rape and the continuous beatings afterward, I gave up and fell asleep.

I didn't want to get into the gory details of the rape.

I took in my surroundings, the strange softness if the sheets, the brightness of the light above my head and the moans of my mother obviously having sex with James in the room next door.

My face and whole body ached. I decided to sit up and inspect the damage.

I slowly walked to my full length mirror, I was still naked. There were bruises all over me, I had a black eye and my face was bloody. My lips were fat and puffy, I hurt all over.

I felt disgusting. I was going to get a shower, pack a small bag and then leave for a few days.

I scrubbed my body at least ten times until I even started to feel clean. I washed my hair repeatedly and still felt like I was disgusting.

I slipped on a pair of skinny jeans and a band t-shirt, I grabbed a pair of flip-flops and brushed my hair. I didn't even bother putting on makeup, knowing that it wouldn't cover up my face.

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I walked down the crowded street with my backpack slung over my shoulder. I ignored the horrified states and pushed past everyone.

My keys jingled from my belt loop, I had locked my bedroom door, so my mother and Janes couldn't get into it.

I pulled out my phone and dialed Jay's number.

"Hello?" I heard his voice, cheery as always.

"Hey Jay, it's Grace. I need you to meet me ASAP, I have left home for a couple of days and you'll see why when you meet me." I mumbled the last part.

"Okay Grace, I'll meet you at Coffee Bean Cafe, okay?" His voice was filled with concern.

I was already outside if the Cafe when Jay pulled up. I saw his reflection in the window as he ran up behind me.

"Grace, are you..." He trailed off as he saw my face. "Oh my god, what happened? Who did this to you?"

"Please, take me back to your place? I don't want anyone to hear me here."

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