Fat Girl Problems

Fat Girl Problem 27: Heartbreak

I walked to English class, trying to act like everything was fine. Like I wasn't heartbroken over the guy I seriously thought liked me, who I actually did like. It sucked. I hate being fat.

Sighing, I opened the door to the English classroom. To my disappointment, Connor was already in the classroom. I didn't want to deal with him, I didn't want to deal with anyone at the moment. No one knew about what happened because I was mortified. I couldn't believe that happened. Naive was the perfect way to describe me.

As I sat down at my desk, Connor's eyes drifted to where I sat next to him and he instantly began to frown. "What's wrong?"

I tried not to look surprised as I looked at him. He's talking to me? How can he tell too?

"Nothing," I lied flatly. "I'm tired."

He raised an eyebrow. "I heard on Tumblr that when a girl says that, she's really sad on the inside."

That comment would - should have made me laugh, but I couldn't. I wasn't overreacting. The truth was it hurt more than anything else in the world, and not even because of the fact I thought he liked me, even though that didn't feel great. The reason why it hurt so much was because it was all due to my size. The fact that I was fat actually. Lately it seemed like that was ruining my life and even though I knew I had to suck it up, I didn't want to. It wasn't fair how I was cursed with a slower metabolism.

"Quinn?"

I realized I hadn't replied to Connor, but I still remained silent. Honestly, I just wanted to be left alone to mourn over my heartbroken heart. Also, I was still mad at Connor even though he was right.

After a few minutes of silent, I glanced at Connor. He was just on his phone, so I slightly relaxed. Now I could suffer alone.

"Brad looks good today," Cece commented casually.

I tensed up at the mention of his name. Before I could stop myself, my eyes drifted to where he sat in Math class. He was laughing with his friends and I found my heart aching more than it already was. He looked really good.

"Quinn, are you okay?" Cece suddenly asked.

"Yeah," I quickly lied.

She frowned. "Where were you at lunch?"

I shrugged. "I needed help in Math."

She stared at me unconvinced for a bit and I just looked away. I didn't want her to know, even though she was my best friend. She had also told me I was naive, but I ignored her. Funny how things turned out because of that.

"Quinn, honestly what's wrong?" she asked again.

"Nothing," I said, trying to smile.

"Quinn..." she said gently.

Her eyes looked so sympathetic that I suddenly felt sickened. Without a word, I got up and ran out of the classroom. I heard my teacher and Cece calling me, but I didn't care. I just needed some water to calm down the sickening feeling in my gut.

When I reached a water fountain, I chugged down water instantly. Tears began to form in my eyes as I kept drinking water. I was just so humiliated, hurt, and mortified. My whole life I had avoided guys and now because of my naivety I ended up like this. Being used by the cute guy I thought really liked me. The worst part was I realized I really liked him a second before I found out the truth.

Pulling myself away from the fountain, I put my face in my hands and sighed. I wouldn't cry, I wouldn't over such a jerk. But it hurt so much because it was my fault to an extent. I was fat, I should of know no guy would actually like me. It was my fault for being such a stupid naive fat girl. Ugh.