I'm Sorry(a Matthew Espinosa fanfic)

Chapter 26

After the service, we all walked down into the basement of the church and there was a slideshow, with a bunch of pictures of Jovin. That broke my heart even more, seeing his smiling face on a screen and not in person.

The whole funeral ended around 3, and everyone went home. We had arrived home around 3:30 because we had to help clean up the church. All I wanted to do was sleep.

I went straight to my room to change and throw my hair back into the bun and put on sweats. I walked back into the living room where everybody was and everybody was already doing their own thing.

Matt handed me my uggs and told me to put them on, but he wasn't telling me where we were going or why. I wanted to know, but I was too mentally drained to ask him a million questions, so I put on my boots and we left.

This time we didn't walk, we took my grandpa's car. I got in the passenger side and waited for Matt to start the car. We arrived at the gas station where we get our milkshakes. I wasn't going to turn down a milkshake, so we walked inside and we both got our usual.

We got our milkshakes and went straight back to the car, where I wasn't allowed to drink my milkshake until we got to our final destination. I still had no idea where this 'final destination' was.

We turned onto a certain street and I knew exactly where we were going. The golf course. Jovin loved golfing. He tried to teach me once, but it was no use. I suck at golfing. But that day, it didn't matter if I was good or not, we had a ton of laughs because of how much I sucked.

The golf course was also attached to the lake, and that's how we found our spot. Because I had finally hit the ball and it went all the way over by the lake, so we had to go find it and we fell upon that little dock. No one used it, and we were tired, so we just took a break and sat there looking at how pretty the lake looked in the summer.

"Why are we going to the golf course?" I asked Matt.

"Just wait and see." He told me looking straight at the road the entire time.

We parked at the golf course and went to the lake. I had no idea why we didn't just drive to the lake, but then I saw why on the way there. The whole town pitched in and created a memorial at the golf course, right next to our spot.

I felt like I was going to cry, but yet again, nothing came out. We sat there for a while on the dock just talking. Well, Matt was talking, I didn't say a word. I didn't feel like really talking. We sat there and ate a nice picnic, well Matt ate. I didn't touch a thing.

"Layla, you have to eat." Matt said with concern in his eyes.

"Matt, I'm not hungry."

"You haven't eaten all day." He said pushing a plate of food towards me.

"Well do you blame me, Matt?" He just looked at me in the eyes. Complete silence. "Well do you? I lost someone, and you're worried about me eating?" I almost yelled at him.

"Layla, I get it, you lost Jovin. I get it, you're hurting. But you have to take care of yourself. I'm not going to let you let yourself go." He said almost yelling back at me. "Jovin wouldn't want that." He said only this time in a whisper.

I took the plate, but I only ate a little. I wasn't even that hungry. When we finished and cleaned up, we went back to the car and made our way home. We didn't talk much. Matt tried to make small talk, but I would only respond with one or two word answers.

Once we made it home, they were eating some casserole, that I'm sure somebody dropped off. They offered us some, but I said we ate at the lake and that I was just going to go to bed. I got to my bedroom, I went straight to the bathroom and started running the water for my shower. I wasn't really doing anything in the shower for a good hour.

I decided that it was about time that I got out, or else Matt might get worried and jump to conclusions. I got out and dried off and changed into my pj's. I walked out and the room was peaceful. There was no one in there. It was nice. I liked it. I walked over to my bed, plugged in my phone and went to sleep. I wouldn't exactly call it sleep, though. Maybe just something that got me away from all of the shit happening in my life at the moment.

A/N: Wow, I'm so sorry it took me so long to update. I really hope you guys like it and you aren't mad at me for waiting this long to update.