Second Chances ~ Y/n x Mattheo

Prologue

Y/n's pov:

Mattheo and I have been together for quite awhile. We love each other, that's all that matters right?

Mattheo and I were up at the Astronomy tower after hours, looking out at the stars. But suddenly, Mattheo leaned in and kissed my cheek. I decided it would be funny to see his reaction if I wiped the kiss away, so I did. He looked at me, confused, and leaned in to kiss my cheek again, which I wiped off once more. I giggled when he gave me confused and playfully hurt look.

"Why are you wiping my kisses away?" Mattheo asked me in a playful way.

I giggled again. "Because it's funny to see your reaction."

He kissed my cheek once more.

I wiped it off again, giggling even more. I saw him giving me a pouty face. "If you're so mad, then do something about it" I challenged.

Mattheo rolled his eyes before he pulled me into a kiss, pinning my hands to my side. I immediately melted into the kiss, kissing him back with tongue as his slid into my mouth. I felt him holding my hands by my sides, and I couldn’t help but want to touch him. I felt him pull my body close to his, pressing his front against mine. I pressed my body further into him, wanting to feel every inch of him. As our tongues danced with each other, he pulled me into his arms.

He pulled his mouth away for a quick breath. "Mine" he mumbled.

"Mm, I know baby" I responded, breathing heavily.

I broke my hands free of his grip and ran my hands in his hair, pressing our lips together again in a hungry kiss. I kissed him with passion and lust and hunger. I pressed my waist against his, trying to tell him with my body that I wanted him. 

As he ran his hands through my hair, he pulled me even closer, our bodies as tightly pressed together as possible. Mattheo groaned, then broke our lips apart to look at me for another moment. He leaned in to kiss me again, this time with even more desperation. I kissed him back, even hungrier as well. I slid my hands down his chest while his fingers curled in my hair. I heard him groan, and it just turned me on more, but I pulled my lips away.

"Mm, Matty?" I asked, breathing heavily.

He looked at me, his eyes full of compassion and kindness. "Yes,
y/n?"

I bit my bottom lip, contemplating if I should tell him or not. "Uhm, Matty, it's just that... you're a great kisser and all, and I love you, obviously, but... it's been over six months of us being together, and we haven't really done anything more than kissing. Yes, technically we've made out, but we never really.... explored... each other, if you know what I mean. It's just just been kind of respectful" I tried to explain vaguely, wanting him to fill in the gaps.

I saw him start to blush when he realized what I was saying. He cleared his throat and looked away. "You want... that?"

I sighed when he looked away. "I'm not saying it has to be that, I'm just saying that, Matty, you barley even touch me. Your hands are either in my hair, holding my hands, or just hugging me. They never even go under my shirt or on my hips or ass or legs or... anywhere else. I-I like to be touched, Matty" I tried to explain.

Mattheos cheeks were burning with embarrassment. He looked away from me, nodding to my words. He tried to change the subject to get away from this conversation, "Well, we don't want to move to fast, right? I want to be respectful of you."

I sighed in slight frustration. I removed my arms from around his neck and dropped them to my side. "Matty, you don't need to be respectful anymore. I know you respect me, I truly do. But I need more than just respect" I said genuinely.

"And it's been over six months. Don't you think it's time to step it up a notch?" I pointed out.

He stared at me for a moment. "I... guess it has been a while, hasn't it? Where... did you want me to... touch you first?" he asked me nervously.

I sighed in relief when he asked me that question. I took his hands softly in mine. "May I?" I asked, asking him to let me show him where.

He nodded his head in agreement, letting his hands be led. I nodded, letting him know that I acknowledge him. I took his hands softly and led them to my waist. I put his hands on my hips, feeling his fingers moving softly on the belt loops of my jeans. Then, I moved his hands under my shirt, which made him blush. I slowly moved his hands up the skin of my stomach, the warmth of his hands was sending chills down my spine. I kept moving his hands up, to my ribs. His hands almost reached my bra, but I could tell he looked nervous so I brought his hands back down. But this time, I didn't stop his hands at my hips. I took a step forward and brought his hands behind me, resting them on my ass. I heard him swallow, taking note of my actions. I sighed when I felt him take control, his hands slid up my back. I felt him thumb rubbing soft circles on the skin on my back. But after a couple minutes, he didn't move his hands, and I began to grow impatient. But I didn't show it.

"Matty? Do I repulse you?" I asked softly, my question catching him off guard.

He looked at me, a bit shocked. He shook his head quickly. "Of course not! You're incredible! I'm just... enjoying it." Mattheo smiled, hoping he didn't blow this. "Your skin... it's so soft... and warm."

"Then how come you won't touch me anywhere else? I tried. I helped you feel all over my body, but the second I put your hands on my ass... you moved them. You put them on my back and have kept them there this whole time. It's like thats the only place you feel comfortable touching me. So, do I repulse you? Is that why you won't touch me anywhere else on your own?" I asked genuinely.

Mattheo thought on my words for a bit before he answered. "It's just... I don't want to be too forward. I respect you so much, and I don't want to take anything too fast. I want to do this right."

He took the chance and moved his hands back down to my hips.

"But I already told you that I know you respect me, and that it's time we move forward. Im tired of playing it safe, of being respectful. I want you to touch me, not in respectful ways. Why can't you understand?" I said bluntly

Mattheo started to get a bit more red in the face. He nodded, acknowledging my words. I felt his hands move up my back, but it still wasn't enough for me. I looked into his eyes ans saw the nervousness there. I gave him a look that told him I'm impatient and wanting... wanting him to do more, thats I've been deprived of what I need. I hoped he understood my look so that he would finally give in. But I sighed in frustration when he moved his hands back down to my hips, then moved them to my hands to hold them in his. I took a step back, breaking our hand contact.

"Mattheo, I can't do this anymore" I said seriously.

"But"- Mattheo started, but paused. "What do you want?" He asked softly after a moment.

"I already told you! I want you to feel comfortable enough with me to touch me like I need!" I snap sadly and frustrated.

I sighed and looked down. "I need someone who's no so.... good" I said quietly.

He sighed and hung his head low, looking at shoes.

"I-I'm sorry. I just need someone who loves me enough to give me what i need. I love, I really do. But I can't be with someone who's not comfortable enough to be with me" I said genuinely

I watched as Mattheo tried his best to hold back tears. He nodded slowly while wiping his eyes. I sighed sadly.

"Please don't cry. It breaks my heart, Matty" I said quietly.

He tried to talk through the tears, but couldn't get the words out. He wiped his tears away, sniffling a tiny bit before nodding in agreement. His heart was broken, just like his trust in me. He looked at me one last time before turning and walking out of the Astronomy tower.