One day, cartman was Living as usual. Being a fat prick and all. He would constantly tell his mom to do stuff for him, and eat Huge portions of processed foods like the average American.
One day however, he decided to play a bit of fortnite.
At school, he would annouce, "hey guys, I'm playing this new game called Fortnite."
"It's been out" Stan said.
"What?" Cartman questioned
"It's been out for 6 years, fatass haven't you gotten caught up?" Stan asked, surprised at how cartman was behind the times.
"Well? I've been too busy gooning for 3 hours to skibiti toilet"
"...what?" Stan was utterly baffled, confused, befounded.
"Yeah you know-"
"just stop cartman. You're just trying to be cool." Kyle Sternly said.
"Maybe, but maybe it'd be cool if you Goon to me" Cartman confidently said
"...you don't even know what the fuck that means you Fatass." Kyle said while blushing intensely
"Gooning means to masturbate." Kenny muffled out.
Cartman was just standing there, embarrassed. "Well, you know, I'm just curious if yall wanted to play Fortnite"
"Only I can later." Kyle said "the others will be busy watching the Fortnite movie.
"And why aren't you going to watch it?" Cartman questioned
"Because it looks bad. That's why." Kyle said
"No it's not!" Stan argued
"It's just gonna be another cash grab" Kyle insisted "you're coping that you've spent 55 dollars on a singular ticket for yourself."
"We'll see." Stan contested "we'll see if it's good"
Off they went their usual bussiness. When cartman went back home, he got on with Kyle.
"Ready to get some wins?" Cartman exclaimed
"No." Kyle answered.
"Let's go!"
They both ready up.
Then Jesus fucking Christ comes in and transports them to the game.
"Huh, where the fuck are we?" Cartman panic
"Uh...." Kyle wondered.
"IT WAS YOU! YOH SENT JESUS TO MAKE US WORK TOGETHER!" Cartman blamed
"NO! I DIDNT?" Kyle screamed "I DIDNT GET JESUS TO TRANSPORT US!"
Hopefully, they'll be able to survive the terror that is Fortnite Battle Royale...
