The Tailor of Kabuki-cho

[0] author note + intro

[A/N] this story was originally meant to be a [reader x hijikata] fic but i'm too lazy to type "[F/N]" a million times （＾ω＾）you can still replace Katsumi with your name if u want and if it'll enhance ur reading experience. enjoy!
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Growing up in Kyoto made me realize a few things- one, I was not cut out to become a geisha, and two, if you didn't become a geisha it seemed like the only way to live independently was to prostitute yourself out in Shimabara. My family clan, Ueto, had been running a tea house for a few centuries. Mother had been pressuring me since I was a little girl to become a geisha.

People in traditional Kyoto considered my appearance strange. I possessed porcelain pale skin and light blue eyes. The part of me that made people stare had always been my long hair that for some strange reason was light pink. There was no way in hell that I'd ever cut my hair- for I was too proud of myself.

Mother and father had become impatient with me around the time I turned eighteen. They were no longer satisfied with my lifestyle choices (aka staying out at night drinking). I was no longer their precious little girl who they could manipulate into the perfect geisha. I'd heard of the Amanto before as they'd visited the tea house, and I learned of Edo. Things seemed more fun over there so I hitched a ride with those freakish chicken-bear hybrid aliens and arrived in Edo.

Finally! I was free! And also about to piss myself because I was so excited! After walking around aimlessly for a few hours I came upon a certain part of town whom the drunken men slurred "Kabuki-cho". The air in Kabuki-cho smelled of alcohol, puke, and disappointment. The homes weren't particularly beautiful and it made me realize that the place seemed more like Shimabara than anything else.

"Excuse me but before I die I need someone to hang this rope," a man with sunglasses said as he approached me.

Now that was definitely unusual, didn't the town bums congregate in some place other than the playground!?! Just before I could even say anything the sunglasses man fell forward and face planted into the ground. A silver curly hair man appeared behind him with his wooden sword drawn. There were two standing behind him, a pale skinned-red haired-blue eyed girl, and a normal guy wearing glasses.

"Hasegawa-san stop asking pretty women to buy you drinks. Now, pretty girl, would you like to get a drink with me? My wooden sword here is big but my other 'sword' is-" the curly haired man began to talk to me as well. His dead fish eyes were directed down at me and it appeared that he was a also blushing a lil bit. Poor guy couldn't even finish talking about his other sword (does that mean he's wealthy?) before he fell on top of Hasegawa and the two people behind him ran towards his side. This time the man behind him was completely different looking.

He had black hair and v shaped bangs. His formal uniform indicated to me that he may be an important person- perhaps in the government or something.

"Sakata Gintoki stop harassing women when you and your fucking hooligans are getting paid to clean up the playground!" the uniform man shouted before he lit a cigarette.

"Pardon me sir, but I'm pretty sure no one says hooligans anymore," I said looking up at uniform man. Well it technically is true! Who says hooligans anyways? Unless you're someone who has a regular diet of kale and wear unsightly glasses, you're not gonna say hooligans! Jeez no wonder this guy smokes, he can't connect with young people anymore even though he looks young!!!

"What did you just say, to me, Hijikata Toshirou, *cough* vice captain *cough* of the Shinsengumi!?!"

"I said that I don't understand why you use outdated language when you could instead say 'squad' or 'goons'! I don't even care about the Shinsengumi!"

"What the!?! Isn't goons an even more outdated term?" the boy wearing glasses turned around shouting.

"Shut up Shinpachi! We don't need logic we're living in a world run by aliens!" Gintoki shouted in a muffled voice.

"I think the more important thing here is why you don't know what the Shinsengumi is! I bet you're some illegal Amanto trying to live here illegally!"

"Now, Hijikata-san, I don't even look remotely like an Amanto! I do not look like some ugly chicken hybrid! How dare you insult me!"

"That's it, I'm arresting you for being here illegally! You're coming with me to the station!" Hijikata grabbed my hand with a firm grip causing my face to go completely red. In Kyoto men didn't just walk around in uniform and grab women!

It was then that the red haired girl threw a punch at my face. She had abnormal strength and even years of me sneaking off to the neighborhood dojo could not prepare me for that hit. The pain was sharp and I knew that my face would swell and bruise, which would be more humiliating than her hit.

"KAGURA!!! WHY DID YOU HIT HER?!?! NOW WE'LL BE ARRESTED TOO!!!" Shinpachi shouted before Kagura pushed him on top of Gintoki who was just starting to stand up.

Long story short, Hijikata hand cuffed me and dragged me away. Apparently I was an alien because of my eyes and long hair. Stereotyping ain't fun! Thus my journey of living in Edo began. Little did I know being arrested was not the worst thing that was going to happen to me as shit hasn't even gone down yet.

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[a/n] sorry if the intro was too long ^_^; tell me what u think!