The Hard Life of a Saint

Chapter One - Irony

She grasped the sheets. Her heart pounding in her ears as her eyebrows furrowed. The pain lingered through out her head and her entire body. She couldn't take the numbing intense nerves, vibrating throughout her as she slowly swung her legs around the side of the bed. Her toes finally meeting the crisp wooden floor as she tucked her head. "God dammit..." She couldn't stop the insane spinning in her head. She blinked a few times as she tried to catch her vision, rings of static faded from the outer part of her eyes in. This was how she started everyday. Waking up to an insane spinning sensation and the near faint-like experience. What a wonderful wake up call.

After she gained consciousness from her 'episode', she venture out of her room. Since her mother was at work she greeted the kitchen to her cats. She never truly ate, which is probably one of the worst things to do given her medical state, but she suffered through the non existent feeling of being hungry. "You hungry, Iz?" She said in a baby voice as she pet her cat after fetching her a bowl of cat food. With Isabel's usual remark with a soft meow, she turned around and walked back to her room. She sat back down, her trip to the kitchen wearing her out immensely as she plopped down quickly in her usual spot so she wouldn't get another episode. She pulled out her book and started reading.

Every day. Every single day. It's the same routine. Episode, get up, sit down, episode. An everyday schedule that wasn't paid for. Her body was reset everyday to feel the same feeling but as if it were new again. She grew old of the dragging out pain but she also at the same time didn't notice it's impact. She adapted to it's nature as she continued everyday life. But still, it was all just not enough for her.

----------

"Remember. Make sure your bag is packed with your medicine and Powerade. You need to keep your potassium levels up, darling." Her mother spoke on the phone, stretching out with long lists of 'Make sure you have this' and 'Don't forget this'. She nodded, her mind not even locked on her mothers words, she was just glad to leave the house for a couple weeks. 'Houston here i come.' She thought in her mind as she finished packing up her bag for her mother to take her to the airport. Ever since the beginning of summer she had a plan to leave to see her Uncle in Houston. She had a close relationship with him since she was born. He had been her rock since her parent divorced. She always felt excitement when she saw him, and she never felt excitement from her long and tiring days.

Her medical issues grew lesser, for she wasn't having as many episodes as usual but she was put on 'Caution' for the rest of the year until her appointment with her Cardiologist and Endocrinologist which was later that year near Christmas. The doctors had been stating that her disease is unknown. They say she has SVT, which means she has a fast heart beat and that would explain all her symptoms. Then others say she has Graves' Disease, which means she has a hyper thyroid but it wouldn't explain her symptoms at all. So the doctors are at a crossroads with what she has and what she doesn't have. It's still very up in the air on what exactly she has conceived.

She remembered when she was little and how she wished for sickness. She wished for a disease that could earn her attention from her family. From someone. Oh how the days had changed for her. She looked at life now as a fragile antique doll. She couldn't bare any more horrible news and the toying of her heart that was played with by medical tests and doctors. The irony of it all was unexplained.