The Moonclover Assassins

Lonley Is All I'll Ever Be (Josh)

I stared at my broad white celling. Nothing interesting about it, but, my mind ran wild as I thought about my past. The past I had created for myself. Killing all those men, women, mothers, fathers, all of the people who were important to somebody else... why did I do it?

If I didn't do it, maybe I wouldn't be so lonely anymore. But all I could feel was alone. And Lonely is all I'll ever be.

12:32 AM was the time shown on my phone, the light of it stung my eyes. I couldn't fall asleep, I couldn't breathe, I couldn't talk, my heart wouldn't beat, my stomach wouldn't digest, I couldn't walk, I couldn't eat, I couldn't take it all back. I couldn't take it all back.

My friends, they had their own lives, their own families, and I made the bright decision to laugh as I saw the people around them break down in tears knowing they'd never see that special person again. The thought still did linger, though, that it was a little funny. Being killed must've made me weaker... less tolerable to the idea of watching others suffer.

"Can't sleep?"

The voice in my head wasn't my own. It was Darktwist's, the most powerful god who ever lived. And no, I'm not joking.

"Why do you care?"

"...because I care about you, Josh."

Communicating through my head never bothered me. But knowing that Dark was lying made it not so fun anymore.

"You're lying. Go away, Dark. Nobody cares about me."

Darktwist did in fact not answer me after that. Sometimes I'd wish he wouldn't listen to me. He never used to, so why does he now? For fifteen years, I've been living on my own. Well, with Darktwist, but basically on my own.

My friends, I'm sure you can assume, all hate me. I mean, I did take their own lives. Shot Lily and Eli, ran over Lucy with a car, burned Daniel's house down, and Marcus... well I never planned to kill him, but he got to me before I got to him.

I broke Marcus so badly that all he could do was get his revenge. Quite honestly, I respect it.

But It was hard for me, because I figured out a long time ago Marcus had been the only one I ever truly felt something for. But I screwed that up. Good job, Josh.

Darktwist appeared into the room suddenly, his arms were crossed and his 10 foot self truly did tower over me. He shrunk down to about 7 feet, then he approached me.

I tried to look away from him, but he came up and looked down on my face. He was creepy, sure, but some part of Darktwist wasn't so intimidating. It could be his personality, or maybe his smile. His smile and personality may just be the most human thing about him. Regarding the pearl white skin, black eyes with bright blue pupils, the black face markings and his brown hair. But I've gotten used to looking into the eyes of a god, in fact, I have the eye of a god.

"Why can't you sleep?" He asked me, and he backed away when I sat up. His tall, muscular figure was nicely outlined in the pitch blackness of my room, but I somehow could still tell he was there. Well, you can always tell when he's there, considering the amount of power and aura he produces when he's simply in the same room as you.

"Seriously, why do you care?" I roll my eyes, then I roll over onto my side, away from his face. I heard him sigh deeply, then he stood up straight.