Star Wars Jedi: The Haunting

Chapter 15

The previous month had been hell for Cal. Pure, unfiltered hell.

After he had woken up, lying on the floor, his memory had been completely broken, and his body immobile. Initially, his vocal cords hadn't even worked well, which was the worst feeling ever. He was in distress, and yet he couldn't scream. All he had been able to do for the first few hours after he woke up was crawl along the ground, making cat-like mewling noises.

It hadn't been that long until someone had found him crawling around and asked him if he was alright. All Cal could do was make animalistic noises and grab at their legs. This behavior, combined with the look in his eyes, must have made the person feel weirded out, and they left.

After a few more hours, he regained some of his ability to sit up and swallow (although not very well), which he had made use of immediately by eating and drinking some of his supplies he always kept in his backpack. He had had to be careful not to choke – he didn't have his gag reflex back, and his system wasn't back to normal yet - but at least knew that he could survive, which was some comfort. He had had to sleep after eating, the very act of doing so having depleted whatever little stamina he had.

The next few days after that had been difficult. His vocal cords gained more strength, but he still proved unable to speak. Although his swallowing ability mostly returned, his gag reflex did not; eating and drinking was a dangerous task. His legs stayed immobile; standing up seemed like an impossibility for him, let alone walking or running. His connection to the Force was blocked. His memories were still broken; he had even forgotten his own name, which made him feel inadequate on so many levels. Furthermore, the person who found him must have told the other locals about his strange behavior, as whenever people caught sight of him, they deliberately avoided engaging with him in any way. And it wasn't like Cal could communicate properly with them. They didn't understand his primal noises, and he couldn't talk, nor could he send a message through the Force. In the end, he just gave up and decided to keep himself to himself.

After 2 and a half weeks, his connection to the Force had begun to return, as well as his ability to talk, though his speech was very slow, and his voice lower and creakier from not speaking for a while. However, these were about the only positive things that had happened in the last week and a half. He still couldn't walk. His memories reshuffled themselves, but stayed broken, only confusing him even more. What had really happened to him? No memories of his name had surfaced either. He had to re-learn how to use the Force – but thankfully, this had gone better than he had expected. It seemed that his mind had never got used to not having it, so getting it back was a major relief for his system. His supplies had also begun to dwindle by this point, but thankfully, - and crucially - he had anticipated this, and so he had made sure there was plenty of food to eat on his part of the planet, since he knew that the locals would not help him. Still, he desperately wished for his memories back. He wished he could walk. He wished he knew his name. He wished someone would help him.

If only someone had told him to be careful what you wish for.

It had almost taken the entire month for his memories to begin to sort themselves out – and when they had, he realized what a blessing it had been to not remember what had happened. His situation was even worse than he had feared. When the gravity of everything that had happened set in, he'd had something of a breakdown, and it had taken him a while to get over it. Even when his breakdown passed, he was left with a sense of loneliness and dread that was worse than anything he'd ever felt before. It was so paradoxical. He craved interaction and company, but he also wanted to be alone, so he could work out his own problems. Especially since it seemed no-one was willing to stick around for him. "Don't assume that we don't still care..." Greez had said. That was a lie. They didn't care about him at all anymore. Greez had only said that to soften the blow. And it hadn't worked.