Repentance

    Hey... It's been a while. I know it's probably not a good time but I need to tell you something. I-I can't explain it too much but I'm being deployed soon. I know it doesn't matter since we're not together anymore, and I don't know if you would actually care but I needed to tell you. 

    I really miss you, your smile, your touch, the way you looked at me. I know the dogs are probably good though. I planted some new flowers at your grave today, I hope you like them. I passed my run this time and should be getting promoted soon, I know you'd be proud to see me moving up in the army. Let the kiddos know how much I love them and miss them. I'm visiting you in the rain because it washes away the pain and tears that I hold for you. 

    Hey, next week I'm shipping out. I asked mom to help you take care of the flowers i gave you. I just wanted to come here and spend a little more time with you. I love you and always will. Those eyes that shimmer like honey in the sun, the laugh that still echoes in my head, your gentle voice speaking to me. I miss the possibilities of us raising kids and growing old. I know its a lot to spill out all at once but i may not be able to see you again. I only say that on the basis of my sins that hold me here, so I ask with clasped hands, that you watch over me in hopes to repent.

    Hey... mom here. I know you cant probably hear me but please watch over my son. I know he loves you still, and misses you dearly. Don't let my baby boy die over there... I'll visit again soon.

    Hey I received a letter today! It's from him and I wanted to open it with you if you don't mind. "Dear mom: I'm writing to you so you know I'm safe. Had a few missiles hit the base today, but no one was injured. Oh I also wanted to say that the views over here are breath taking, the sun fading behind the mountains like a shining gold light. I can't wait to come home, I love you and hope your doing alright. -Your Loving Son." Thanks for listening to the letter from him. I'll come around when the next one arrives.

    So, I have some bad news... His base was hit today, and there were no survivors. The men in dress uniform's came... I'm so sorry. I'm doing all i can to not breakdown right now. I found this letter he left at home that said to read it if he didn't come home. I'll do my best to read it to you. "Dear loved ones: I know i wasn't the perfect human, but I tried, I wasn't the best friend, but I tried... My life was a constant pain. I considered it to be revenge for being born but in time I realized that it was pain that absolved my bad deeds. I write this knowing I may not be here soon and I hope that not only my family, but my one true love can forgive me. I will miss everyone and I'm sorry I'll miss seeing the little cousins grow up. Love: Your fallen Soldier"