I'll Never Stop Crashing

I just need a friend.

Fletcher’s POV

I watched her jump of the jetty and softly land in the sand. She actually looked graceful for once as she walked away. Until she looked behind and saw me standing there gawking at her and started sprinting. I was in awe as I watched Crash run down the beach. I know I had fucked up big time a few years ago. I was an asshole who was thinking with the brain in his pants not the one in his head. With Crash gone I was tired all the time and I was empty inside. I became depressed. And as much as it hurts my pride I started cutting. It made me numb, forgetting all that I’d lost. The scars were there alright and I started wearing my watch to cover it up on my left wrist, and the bracelets Crash and Ivy had made me. It didn’t do much good because you could still see them but it was a distraction. In Miami I was the dark new boy with a few friends. I still played sports and because I was good I had guys on the team look after me but I never really went to parties, dances or anything really. I went home, Praying the day my dad would decide to move back to Maine. Here I was the preppy, always happy, spaz, flirt social Fletcher. I knew Willa could tell but no one else did. I was an act the past few years. Proving the point I was nothing without Crash I needed her. I yearned for her laugh, her falls and her devilish pranks. I was happy here. But she didn’t realize it. She was still mad at me. She always holds grudges, that’s an infamous Crash trait. But I had to have her back. Maybe not as my girl but as a friend. I just want her to not look at me with disappointment and pain anymore. I’ve already apologized. I don’t know what else to do. I’ll just wait for her to come around. I mean seriously I’m pretty irresistible. I’ll kill her with kindness? I’ll wait for her to talk to me just like she said. I still haven’t explained what happened at that stupid party. She wouldn’t talk to me after it left. Or Carrie. When I left she never said goodbye. Thats what hurt the most is that she didn’t even come to our going away party. When we left in our car to drive to our new house she didn’t even come outside. I even saw her in the window watching us get in. I gave her a salute like I usually do, it was our thing. She flipped me off. It hurt so bad my heart dropped and knees went weak and I got an instant migraine. She never was hostile to me, and she hadn’t stopped since. 

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Crash’s POV

I sat in my bedroom on my queen sized bed, with my face in my pillow pet. I kept replaying Willa and I’s conversation. Did Fletcher really miss me? I had know idea. Frankly, I was scared shitless. For me that is big. Crash Emerson the Daredevil. My title was faltering. I thought about Fletcher and how sincere he looked on the beach. He said he wasn’t going to hurt me. He always kept his promises. But what was stopping him. Last time he broke my heart and the pain I felt after that was excruciating. It was as though my head and my heart shut down completely and I was alone in a cave with 24 hours to live. My thoughts were interrupted when there was a soft knock on my door. I didn’t want to talk. So I ignored it. I pulled out my sketch pad that was under my pillow and started drawing someones face. This happened to me. I’d start drawing before I even knew what. The eyes were bold and the lips in a small smirk and looked soft and completely kissable. Kissable? Since when do I consider my fantasy kissable?  The knock was there again. I ignored it again. I picked up my ipod, plugging in my ihome blasting Green Day and blocking out the world. I started back to drawing. Before long I realized I was drawing Fletchers face. I ripped it out, crumpled it in a ball and threw it on the cold hard wood floor. I heard banging on my door. This time I didn’t ignore it. 

“GO AWAY!” I yelled. Turning up the music louder and began sketching again. This time the beach. A girl sitting on the jetty and looking behind her shoulder with a smile. She looked so happy. The door burst open and I looked over to see Fletcher. He was sopping wet dripping all over my floor. His sweatshirt soaked through. His shorts clung to his hips like a heavy skin, his sneakers in his hands. He was wearing black nike socks one higher than the other. His hair messily stuck up and his bottom lip was in between his teeth. He was nervous. 

“ You never listen do you?” I hissed my words stinging. 

“Your a hard girl to get to.” He said with a serious face.

“You didn’t answer me. What the hell are you going here Fletcher? This is my house. My room. I shut the door for a reason. I didn’t answer for a reason.” Didn’t he understand I didn’t want to talk to him. He never listened to me. Rules never applied to him. 

“Your mom let me in. And told me you were in your room.” Seriously does anyone ever hear of privacy in this house? In this neighborhood? 

“Tell me this. Why are you here? Why are you wet? And What the hell do you want? I can actually kick your ass now. I’m not a little girl. I kick-box.” It’s true. Without Fletcher to protect me I took classes in my gym. I had an older brother to pummel me. I grew up with boys. I was good to.

“I don’t want to fight you Crash. We need to talk. And if you didn’t sit in room all day. And didn’t shut everyone out maybe you would realize that it was raining out? I had to bike home from work.” He remarked. He pissed me off because he was right. And I was wrong and that always set me on edge.

“ You don’t get.” I seethed. “ I don’t want to talk. I want you to leave.” My voice cracked which I hated. It made me sound vulnerable.  

“Crash stop being a stuck up bitch. You need to realize that I care about you. This isn’t about us. I need a friend. I need help. Ivy ran away.” His words stung. My heart dropped. Ivy? She was a little sister to me. She was older now but not old enough.  She always listened to me. She was so shy and whenever something went wrong she’d come to me. When she was in Miami we’d talk on the phone on wednesday afternoons. I’d never told anyone though.  He looked at me then down at his feet. He shuck the water out of his hair and it sprayed me. I couldn’t help but giggle at a memory of him when we were younger. His dog would always shake after he got out of the water. So fletcher would too. But purposefully on me. I smiled at him. I got up and gave him a hug. My head came up to about his chest he was so tall now. I could feel him soften and hug me back.

“I will help you. But this doesn’t change where we are. We still need to talk. But since a curly haired girl is missing we don’t have time for that. Lets get moving Flippy.” 

He smirked at me remembering the childhood nickname. I slipped on my black lacrosse sweatshirt. Changing into my jeans not even caring Fletcher was there. Yeah I was pissed at him like hell but that didn’t change the fact that I am super comfortable with him. I put my red high top sneakers.

“Flippy need any clothes? I can steal some of Shawn’s?” I laughed.

“Nah I’ll get wet anyway.” I giggled.

“What your gonna get some before you find your baby sister? Seriously Fletch.” 

“Oh shove it crash.” He laughed at my dirty joke and pushed me down the stairs to go find Ivy.