Fat Girl Problems

Fat Girl Problem 32: Feelings

"Are you sure you're okay with this?" I asked.

"Of course Quinn," Thea said gently as she straightened the last strand of my hair.

I looked up at her to see that she was wearing a neutral expression. That made me gulp because Thea was always full of smiles. You see, just a few days ago I told her about Connor and me. Surprisingly she didn't have much of a reaction. She just said she had an idea and laughed half-heartily. That reaction actually hurt more than the reaction of her slapping me would have. I really wanted her to be okay with this because Connor was technically hers first and I cared about her.

"Thea, you can be honest," I insisted.

She shrugged. "Fine, obviously I'm not happy about it, but I'm happy for you. You and Connor are perfect for each other, anyone can see that. You're both amazing people unlike me."

"You're a good person."

"No Quinn," she said seriously. "I'm a horrible person who only became friends with you because of Connor."

My eyes widened, even though I should of expected that. Ouch. I am really naive.

"But I actually really do like you and being your friend is awesome," Thea quickly added gently. "That's why I'm happy you're going to be with the guy I love."

A smile instantly formed on my lips as I quickly got up. She frowned as she held the straightener up. Ignoring the possibility of getting burn, I hugged her.

"Thank you, you're awesome," I said, hugging her tightly.

She giggled. "No problem Quinn."

I let go of her as I realized Connor would be here soon. Looking at the mirror at my side, I stared at myself. The first question that popped into my mind was; how could Connor like me?

"Do I look fine?" I asked Thea nervously.

Thea rolled her eyes playfully. "You look amazing Quinn. That dress looks perfect on you and you're naturally beautiful."

I stared at myself some more. I was wearing a black dress that was fit at my waist, but flowed out. A part of me thought I looked bigger, so I had no idea if what she said was true. Me being naturally beautiful was also something I disagreed with too.

Despite all that, I said, "Okay, thank you for all your help."

Ding dong.

"You're welcome, now go to your man," Thea replied, grinning.

Smiling, I quickly hugged her and then ran downstairs. I grabbed a pair of black flats, put them on, and then opened the door. Physically, I literally had to stop my jaw from dropping as Connor stood in front of me smiling. He looked gorgeous. He was wearing a red button up top and black skinny jeans. His smile completed his look perfectly as his gently eyes gazed at me.

Before I could say anything, he said, "You look beautiful Quinn."

I blushed. "Thank you. You look...pretty good yourself."

He chuckled lightly as he extended a hand towards me. "Shall we."

"Of course," I said, taking his hand.

So far our date was going perfectly. Connor was the perfect gentleman and amazing company. My tummy hurt from laughing as we talked about pointless things during dinner at a nice restaurant. Honestly he was so funny and sweet that I couldn't believe I didn't see all these amazing features of him clearly before. Before he was just some scary guy who happened to protect me. Funny how things could change so drastically.

"Finished?" Connor asked smiling.

I smiled. "Yeah, let's go."

We got up together and began to walk off side-by-side. I felt his hand touch mine, so I grabbed it. I knew that I shouldn't fall someone too quickly because they could be like Brad, but I trusted Connor. After everything that happened these past months, I honestly didn't trust anyone as much as I trusted Connor. A part of me knew he was a keeper.

As we walked outside of the restaurant, a little girl suddenly approached Connor. A woman who looked like her mom followed behind wearing a frantic expression.

"Sir, why are you holding hands with her?" the little girl asked.

"Because I like her," Connor simply said.

I began to smile, but soon stopped as the little girl said, "Why? She's so fat. You can do way better."

"Allison!" her mom exclaimed, grabbing her arm. "Don't say that!"

Without another word, the mom just dragged the little girl away. The little girl whined the entire way and I just watched the scene. I was actually speechless because her words were true. He could do so much better. I was fat and ugly and he was hot and amazing.

"Quinn, ignore her. You're beautiful," Connor said, seeing my reaction,

"Why do you like me?" I suddenly asked, looking at him seriously. "You can do way better than me. I'm fat, ugly, and my personality isn't that great either. You can do so much better, so maybe we should stop this."

"Quinn, honestly I want you to realize this," he said sadly, taking a step closer to me. "You're so beautiful that it drives me insane. I don't like you because of that though, I like you because you're so kind, funny, smart, and adorable in a way that's so fucking innocent and awkward that I just can't stop thinking about you."

"I'm still fat," I muttered, still not convinced he could like me.

"Quinn, you're not and even if you are I don't understand why that would effect the way I feel about you. A body is just a body. It doesn't change who you are. Society is stupid in that sense. You don't fall for someone for something that doesn't last more than a decade. You fall for them for the timeless and priceless things such as their personality. Looks catch someones attention, but in the end it's whats inside that will keep it."

I stared at him wide-eyed as his words rolled around in my heart. It was true, but I couldn't believe him. I just couldn't because of that single girl's words.

"There are other girls with great personalities too," I simply said.

"There are, but I only want you," he said softly.

He gently pressed his lips against mine, making my cheeks heat up as I kissed him back. His lips felt perfect against mine as usual and I felt myself warming up to the idea of his feelings.

"Do you trust me?" he asked, pulling away but placing his forehead on mine.

"Yeah," I said softly. "I do."

"Good, I hope you can like yourself the way I like you," he said, closing his eyes briefly. "That would mean you'd love yourself."

My cheeks heated up even more as I realized his meaning. Oh Connor.

Closing my eyes, I said gently as a smile formed on my lips, "Hopefully."