[The episode opens up to a shot of Heaven's golden gates. The gates open and "Cherub towne" is shown. Cletus flies in front of the camera.]
Cletus: Well, howdy! I'm Cletus! Welcome to Heaven! Guess you did somethin' good to get here, and good people deserve to give loved ones special blessin's!
[The Cherubs begin singing the C.H.E.R.U.B Jingle.]
[Cuts to a man jumping out of an airplane. He pulls the ripcord to release his parachute, only for it to snap off instead. He splats onto a rock while a censoring cloud bubble reads "OWIE!"]
[The Cherubs appear on a small, old-fashioned TV which zooms out onto the I.M.P HQ. Blitzo blasts the TV with his flintlock pistol, and it explodes.]
Millie: Nice one, B!
Blitzo: Gimme another, Mox.
[Moxxie nervously sweeps away the flaming debris and puts another old-fashioned TV onto the stand. He turns it on with a scared look on his face. The 666 News logo appears. Blitzo pours gunpowder into his flintlock as Y/N is shown being a little pissed off by the destruction of expensive property.]
Y/N: Blitzo, you really need to stop doing this.
Blitzo: I'll stop when I feel like it.
Y/N: *groans*
Blitzo: Anyway, nah. Not feelin' it. Next!
[Moxxie switches the channel. A demonically dressed Betty Boop appears in black and white, dancing erotically with prominent, bouncing breasts, holding a pitchfork. Moxxie flinches in anticipation. Blitzo and Millie look bored.]
Blitzo: Uh-huh. Keep going, keep goin', keep goin'...
[Moxxie switches the channel again. Wally Wackford appears on the screen dressed in white with a black top hat, holding a cane.]
Y/N: *annoyed* Not this idiot!
Wally Wackford: I say, I say, are you lookin' to get work making crazy contraptions and goofy gadgets?
[Wally whacks his cane on the wall at either side of him, producing the graphics for "CRAZY CONTRAPTIONS" and "GOOFY GADGETS" as he speaks.]
Wally Wackford: WELL, call me at Wacky Wally Wackford's Wacky Idea Factory,
[The Wacky Wally Wackford's Wacky Idea "Factory" ™ title appears against a similar circular background of classic old cartoons. The panel with the title then falls over forwards, landing with a ]
Wally: Where you make the things and I make the money!
[Wally moves close to the screen with a pleading look.]
Wally: Please! I'm very desperate!
Blitzo: Bingo!
[Blitzo shoots and explodes the TV again, scattering debris.]
Millie: WOO! You're on a roll, sir!
[The camera pans over to Loona, who snores and drools while sleeping in a chair. She has one foot up on the table that twitches in her sleep. A plastic cup with her name written on it and filled with water sits on the table next to her foot. She is awoken by a rumbling which also knocks her cup over, spilling its contents.]
YOU ARE READING
A God Can't Die, Only Fall
ActionY/N, A Fallen God who was betrayed by Zeus and the other Greek Gods was sent down to hell's pride ring for unknown reasons. Join him and see how he does in hell, will he learn to fit in or will he just destroy hell entirely, only one way to find out...