Abyssal Reverie

Chapter 20: Levitate

"You lie an inch apart on your own continuum. Now keep the freakshow talk to a careful minimum."

The night turned to day as the ship's rocking lulled the aching in my ever-broken body. The moments alone with Vessel were the ones that brought me the most peace. The soft-spoken nature that had arisen in him over the last few hours shook me to my core. I hadn't realized I missed the time I spent with him healing from the ether, the tenderness of his skin on mine, wrapped in the wonder of where we were going and how I ended up battered and bruised. That fear that lingered in my chest then was here again. The news of the Mother of Monsters brought on uncertainty, and there was a constant fear of what was to come—who I was to be at the end of all of this.

"She will be your downfall, if not by me, then by someone else. You know as well as I do that she cannot be contained. Not in this life or the next."The Mother of Monsters words rang through my mind, the bile bubbling up inside me faster than I had time to squash it. It was as if, foretold, long before I entered this plain of existence, the Gods had decided who I would become. A Deity of Destruction long forgotten on a page of old tales. Was I ever truly myself? Was the fight I had in me ever really mine, or was it a predetermined amount of vengeance poured into me by distant ancestors craving absolution on their behalf?

Had my mother known who I was to become? Had she known that without the decimation of my entire family, I wouldn't be able to pull this dark being from deep within myself? It was terrifying to think that my path was chosen for me. A path that, according to the darkest being I had ever encountered, would lead me to betray the people who keep me afloat and save me from myself. A wave of grief layered itself onto me, the sickness carving its way deep into my bones and settling there like a well-traveled bard ready for his next stage cue. The overwhelming need for answers battled against a desire to remain in the dark. The smallest part of me now lingers in the shadows, afraid of who else lives within the folds of my being.

You are lingering in your mind longer than you usually do. Are you feeling alright?  Vessel's honey-dipped voice startled me. I hadn't realized he was listening to me or waiting to jump out of the void and join my inner monologue. I was not listening long, Little Lion Fish—just long enough to realize you would get trapped there if I didn't help you.

The smooth tinge of his lilt caused my heart to stop, relieved that he hadn't lingered in my mind. I raised my hands to my eyes, adjusting the thick strap of fabric still gingerly placed there; the grittiness of each fold of the scraps caused my skin to pimple.

"What time is it?" The soft heat of the sunlight was warming my side, signaling that it must not have been that late in the day. It didn't hurt to breathe quite yet; the moisture from the water was not thick in the air like it would be at high noon. The harsh bobbing of the ship beneath me was the first indication that we were still barreling toward our destination. My abdomen still felt stiff, the laceration hot to the touch as it attempted to piece itself back together. The thick needlework tugs at the wound's edges, causing a dull ache. My face felt sticky with salty brine surrounding the thick fabric.

I needed a bath, but I feared I would need help—he would have to help me, and I wasn't sure I was ready to ask that of him yet. I wanted to let him see all of me, even after the times he had stitched my broken skin back together.

"Just before Noon, I believe when Simon checked the dial, it was just after 11." The raspy lilt that escaped his lips caused my stomach to jump. It was as if I had just pulled him from a deep sleep. It never got old, hearing him speak to me.

"How is III?" I shifted in the cot beneath me, resting my head against the hard grains of the ship. "He is doing better. The swelling has gone down. I imagine we can take that blindfold off sooner than I anticipated. You, on the other hand, aren't anywhere near where I want you to be. You need to continue to rest." "I want to see him." My voice caught in my throat, and I did not realize what I was saying before it left my mouth. "Want to see who, Selah?" I could hear Vessel's voice shifting, the concern lingering at the end of each word. "Giffy." It was like the name sucked all the air from the room. Like speaking his name was a sin, too unforgivable to let walk amongst the rest of the ship dwellers. "No." That was all he said, ending with a harsh groan to emphasize how much he meant it."We need to ask him questions and figure out what she wanted. She took control of him so easily. Don't you want to know how to protect him and everyone on this ship from her doing it again? We are vulnerable to another attack." I raised my voice, the gash aching under the command of my diaphragm.