THE ADVENTURES OF WOLF ACADEMY-IN THE TEMPLE OF DOOM-AND-WOODS-TALES

PROLOGUE

(ENJOY!)

NARRATOR-Once upon a time-!

I wish...

-in a far-off kingdom-!

More than anything...

-lived a young fairy princesses-maidens-!

More than life...

-two young lads-princes-

More than jewels...

I wish...

-and a childless-wood-carver-man-!

More than life-!...

I wish!...

-with his wife!

More than anything...

More than the moon-!

I wish!...

The King is giving a Festival!

More than life!...

I wish!...

I wish to go to the Festival-

More than riches...

And the Ball...

I wish my cow would give us some milk

More than anything...

I wish we had a child

Please, pal-

I want a child...

Squeeze, pal

I wish to go to the Festival

I wish you'd give us some milk
Or even cheese...

I wish we might have a child

I wish...

You wish to go to the Festival?

The poor girls's mothers had died-!

You, Cinder-zella, the Festival?!
You wish to go to the Festival?!

What, you, Cinder-zella, the Festival?!
The Festival?!

What, you wish to go to the Festival?!

The Festival?!
The King's Festival!?

-and her father had taken for his new wife-!

The Festival!?

-a woman with two daughters of her own.

Look at your nails!

Look at your dresses!

People would laugh at you-!

Nevertheless-!
I still wish to go to the Festival!

You still wish to go the Festival-!

She still wants to go the Festival-!

-And dance before the Prince?!

narrator-All three of them were beautiful of faces, but vile, cruel, mean, and black of heart,
Johnny-Seedman, on the other hand, had no father, and his mother-!

I wish!...

narrator-Well, she was not quite beautiful-!

I wish my son were not a fool!
I wish my house was not a mess!
I wish the cow was full of milk!
I wish the walls were full of gold-!
I wish a lot of things!!...

Ugh, you foolish child! What in Heaven's name are you doing with the cow inside the house?

A warm environment might be just what Milky-White needs to produce his milk!

It's a she! How many times must I tell you? Only "she"s can give milk

woodacarver's baker-wife-Why, come in, little girl.

Magenta-riding-hood-gal-I wish...
It's not for me!
It's for my Grannys in the woods!
A loaf of bread, please-!
To bring my poor old hungry!
Granny in the woods!...
Just a loaf of bread, please!...

Narrator-Cinderella's stepmother had a surprise for her.

Step-mom-I have emptied a pot of lentils into the ashes for you. If you have picked them out again in two hours' time, you shall go to the Ball with us.

(And perhaps a sticky bun?...)
(Or four?...)

Cinder-zella-Birds in the sky!
Birds in the eaves!
In the leaves!
In the fields!
In the castles and ponds!!...

(... and a few more of those pies...)
Please...)

Come, little birds!
Down from the eaves!
And the leaves!
Over fields!
Out of castles and ponds!...

(No, squeeze, pal...)

(Ah-ah-ah!!...)

Quick, little birds!
Flick through the ashes!
Pick and peck, but swiftly!
Sift through the ashes!
Into the pot!...

Johnny's mom-Listen well, son. Milky-White must be taken to market.

But, Mother, no-he's the best cow-!

Was. Was! She's been dry for a week. We've no food nor money, and no choice but to sell her while she can still command a price!

But Milky-White is my best friend in the whole world!

But look at her!
(Sung)
There are bugs on her dugs!
There are flies in her eyes!
There's a lump on her rump!
Big enough to be a hump-!

But-!

Son! Honey!
We've no time to sit and dither
While her withers wither with her-
[*cough cough*]
And no one keeps a cow for a friend!
Sometimes I fear you're touched!...

Magenta-riding-hood-Into the woods!
It's time to go!
I hate to leave!
I have to, though!
Into the woods-!
It's time, and so!
I must begin my journey!

Into the woods!
And through the trees!
To where I am!
Expected, ma'am!
Into the woods!
To Grandmother's house-!
(Muffled)
Into the woods!
To Grandmother's house-!

Woodcarver's wife-You're certain of your way?!

The way is clear!
The light is good!
I have no fear!
Nor no one should!
The woods are just trees!
The trees are just wood!
I sort of hate to ask it!
But do you have a basket?!

Don't stray and be late!

And save some of those sweets for Granny!

Haha!...
Into the woods!
And down the dell!
The path is straight!
I know it well!
Into the woods!
And who can tell!
What's waiting on the journey?!

Into the woods!
To bring some bread!
To Granny who!
Is sick in bed!
Never can tell!
What lies ahead!
For all that I know!
She's already dead!

But into the woods!
Into the woods!
Into the woods!
To Grandmother's house!
And home before dark!

Fly, birds!
Back to the sky!
Back to the eaves!
And the leaves!
And the fields!
And the-!

step-sisters-Hurry up and do my hair, Cinder-zella!
Are you really wearing that?!

Here, I found a little tear, Cinderella!
Can't you hide it with a hat?!

Cinder-zella-You look beautiful!

Step-sisters-I know!

She means me!

Put it in a twist!

Who will be there?...

Cinder-Zella-Mother said be good!
Father said be nice!
That was always their advice!
So be nice, Cinderella!
Good, Cinderella!
Nice good good nice-!

Tighter!

What's the good of being good!
If everyone is blind!
And you're always left behind?!
Never mind, Cinder-zella!
Kind Cinder-zella!
Nice, good, nice, kind, good, nice-!

(step-sister-1-Not that tight!!...)

(Sorry.)

(Clod!)
(both-step-sisters-Hmm, hmm, hmm, ahahahahahahaha!!...)

Narrator-Because the Woodcarver-man had lost his mother and father in a baking accident-well, at least that's what he believed-he was eager to have a family of his own, and was concerned that all efforts, until now had failed!...

woodcarver-man-Who might that be?!

wood-carver's wife-We have sold our last loaf of bread!...

wood-carve-man-It's the Witch from next door!...

both-We have no bread!

the witch-Of course you have no bread!

both-wondered-What do you wish?!

the witch-It's not what I wish. It's what you wish
Nothing cooking in there now, is there?

Narrator-The old enchantress went on to tell the couple that she had placed a spell on their house.

What spell?

the witch-In the past, when you were no more then a babe, your father brought his young wife and you to this cottage. They were a handsome couple, but not handsome neighbors. You see, your mother was with child and she had developed an unusual appetite. She took one look at my beautiful garden and told your father that what she wanted, more than anything in the world was-!...
(Sung)
Greens, greens, and nothing but greens!
Parsley, peppers, cabbages and celery!
Asparagus and watercress and-!
Fiddleferns and lettuce-!

He said, "All right,"
But it wasn't, quite!
'Cause I caught him in the autumn!
In my garden one night!
He was robbing me!
Raping me!
Rooting through my rutabaga!
Raiding my arugula!
And ripping up the rampion!
(My champions! My favorites!) -!
I should have laid a spell on him!
Right there!
Could have turned him into a stone!
Or a dog or a chair!
Or a snail-!

But I let him have the rampion-
I'd lots to spare
In return, however
I said "Fair is fair:
You can let me have the baby
That your wife will bear
And we'll call it square."

woodcarver-man-wondered-I had a brother?

the witch-No. But you had a sister.

Narrator-But the witch refused to tell him any more of his sister. Not even that her name was Rapunzel. She went on:

the witch-I thought I had been more than reasonable, and that we all might live happily ever after. Well how was I to know what your father had also hidden in his pocket? You see, when I had inherited that garden, my mother had warned me I would be punished if I were ever to lose any of the-!... Beans!

Both wondered-Beans?!...

the witch-The special beans!
I let him go!
I didn't know!
He'd stolen my beans!
I was watching him crawl!
Back over the wall-!
And then bang! Crash!
The lightning flash!
And-well, that's another story!
Never mind-!
Anyway, at last!
The big day came!
And I made my claim!
"Oh, don't take away the baby,"
They shrieked and screeched!
But I did!
And I hid her!
Where she'll never be reached!

Your father cried!
And your mother died!
When for extra measure-!
I admit it was a pleasure-!
I said, "Sorry!
I'm still not mollified!..."
And I laid a little spell on them-!
You too, son-!
That your family tree!
Would always be!
A barren one!...

the witch went on-So there's no more fuss!
And there's no more scenes!
And my garden thrives-!
You should see my nectarines!
But I'm telling you the same!
I tell Kings and Queens:
Don't ever never ever
Mess around with my greens!
Especially the beans!!...

Johnny's mom-Now listen to me, Johnny. Lead Milky-White to market and fetch the best price you can. Take no less than five pounds. Are you listening to me?!...

Johnny-Yes!

Now how much are you to ask?

Johnny-No more than five pounds!?!...

Both-Less. Than five!
Less than five!!...

Jack Jack Jack
Head in a sack
The house is getting colder
This is not a time for dreaming

Chimney stack!
Starting to crack!
The mice are getting bolder!
The floor's gone slack!
Your mother's getting older!
Your father's not back!
And you can't just sit here dreaming pretty dreams!
To wish and wait!
From day to day!
Will never keep!
The wolves away!...

So into the woods!
The time is now!
We have to live!
I don't care how!
Into the woods!
To sell the cow!
You must begin the journey!
Straight through the woods!
And don't delay-!
We have to face!
The marketplace!
Into the woods to journey's end-!

Into the woods to sell a friend-!

Oh, someday you'll have a real pet, Johnny-boy!

Johnny-wondered-A piggy?!...

'No, my dear!...'-Johnny's mom

Narrator-Meanwhile, the witches, for purposes of their own, explained how the woodcarver-man might lift the spell-!

the witches-You wish to have!
The curse reversed?!
I'll need a certain!
Potion first-!
Go to the woods-! and bring me back!
One: the crowns as white as milk!
Two: the necklaces-and-hoods as red as blood!
Three: the gold-gems as yellow as corn!
Four: the shoes as pure as gold!

Bring me these!
Before the chime!
Of midnight!
In three days' time!
And you shall have!
I guarantee!
A child as perfect!
As child can be!...
Go to the woods!!...

step-mom-Ladies!
Our carriage waits!...

Cinder-zella-Now may I go to the Festival?

Step-mom-The Festival-!
(Sung) Darling, those nails!
Darling, those clothes!
Lentils are one thing but!
Darling, with those!
You'd make us the fools of the Festival!
And mortify the Prince!...

Cinder-zella's dad-The carriage is waiting!...

(We must be gone!...)

Cinder-zella-Good night, Father!...)

[*grunts*]

(I wish!...)

Look what I found in Father's hunting jacket!

Six beans!

I wonder if they are-!

The witch's beans! We'll take them with us.

No! You are not coming!

I know you are fearful of the Woods at night

The spell is on my house!
Only I can lift the spell!
The spell is on my house!

No, no, the spell is on our house!
We must lift the spell together!
The spell is on our house!

No. You are not to come and that is final. Now, what am I to return with?

You don't remember?!
(Sung)
The crowns as white as milk!
The necklaces as red as blood!
The gold-gems as yellow as corn!
The shoes as pure as gold-!

The crowns as white as milk!
The necklaces as red as blood!
The gold-gems as yellow as corn!
The shoes as pure as gold!...

Narrator-And so the baker, reluctantly, set off to meet the enchantress' demands. As for Cinder-zella-!

I still wish to go to the!
Festival The crowns as white as milk!
But how am I ever to get to The necklaces as red as blood!
The Festival? The gold-gems as yellow as corn-!
I know! The what?!...
I'll visit Mother's grave The shoes-!...
The grave at the hazel tree! (The shoes as pure as gold...)
And tell her I just want to go! (The crown, the necklace!)
To the King's Festival!... (The shoes as pure as gold-!!...)

(The hair-!)

Into the woods!
It's time to go!
It may be all!
In vain, I know!
Into the woods-!
But even so!
I have to take the journey!

Into the woods, the path is straight!
You (I) know it well!
But who can tell-?!

Into the woods to lift the spell-!

all-Into the woods to visit Mother-!

Into the woods to fetch the things-!

To make the potion-!

To go to the Festival-!

Into the woods!
Without regret!
The choice is made!
The task is set!
Into the woods!
But not forget-!
Ting why I'm (you're) on the journey!

Into the woods!
To get my (our) wish!
I don't care how!
The time is now!
Into the woods-!

To sell the cow-!

Into the woods to get the money-!

Into the woods to lift the spell-!

To make the potion-!

To go to the Festival-!

Into the woods to Grandmother's house!...
(Muffled)
Into the woods to Grandmother's house!...

All-The way is clear!
The light is good!
I have no fear!
Nor no one should!
The woods are just trees!
The trees are just wood!
No need to be afraid there-!

(There's something in the glade there...)

Into the woods!
Without delay!
But careful not!
To lose the way!
Into the woods!
Who knows what may!
Be lurking on the journey?

Into the woods!
To get the thing!
That makes it worth!
The journeying!
Into the woods!...

To see the King-!

To sell the cow-!

To make the potion-!

To see-!
To sell-!
To get-!
To bring-!
To make-!
To lift-!
To go to the Festival-!

Into the woods!
Into the woods!
Into the woods!
Then out of the woods!
And home before dark!!..."-

Fin. GAME OVER. THE END.