A story isn't over until there's a happy ending

CHAPTER ONE

STANS POV: It's not like I don't like my life, I mean it's not all that bad but sometimes the bad shit outweighs the good shit and I just can't stand the fact that i'm alive, and its not like I don't have friends either I have quite a few but it's just not enough to save me I guess. I don't mean to sound ungrateful for them though I love them a whole damn lot and I don't know where i'd be if I didn't have them but there's just too many distractions going on in my life to notice their impact all the time, like when Mom and Randy got divorced when I was a kid I was devastated and it all went to shit from there. Randy refused to move out and Mom didn't want to be homeless so we all just stayed, Randy was quick to start drinking and doing more drugs which makes him violent, he would often beat Me, Mom and Shelly. They don't deserve this life, I'm glad Shelly almost has enough to move out but i'll miss her because then it's just me left to protect Mom. She doesn't fight back, she yells but never fights back, I wish she would just fight back.

I got up pretty early to today, but how could I not? The sun was blaring in my face at 6 in the morning and I forgot to shut my curtains...great I guess. I sat up and lazily rubbed my eyes trying to glance at my clock, I got out of bed and picked out something from my wardrobe, I didn't really care what at this point. I quickly changed and went to brush my teeth, whilst I was in the bathroom I noticed I was home alone...I took the opportunity to change the bandages wrapped around my arms, I didn't want anyone to know what I had done and I definitely didn't want to explain to anyone what was going on. I put on my hoodie and grabbed my bag at the front door, I threw it over my shoulder and left the house and made my way to the bus stop to meet Kyle, Kenny and Cartman.

"Oh for fuck sakes Cartman! drop it already you fatass bitch" I could hear Kyle arguing as I approached the bus stop, I rolled my eyes, great this again. "Stop being a whiny ass Jew baby Kahl" Cartman said in a mocking tone. I sighed as I leaned against the bus stop. "Do you guys ever give it a rest? Can you not be loud dickheads for just one minute!? God..." I groaned tilting my head to glare at them. "Are you alright Stan? Whats wrong?" Kyle says sounding worried, he smiled at me warmly, and the rush of guilt hit me like a brick, I shouldn't have yelled at him like that he did nothing wrong! he never does anything wrong. "Stan?" he was right next to me now. I nodded at him because I didn't quite know how to lie to him, how convincing Stan woohoo.

We are in 11th grade and Mr Garrison has been our teacher since third grade, I don't know how he managed to keep his job all this time, but they can't hire anyone else because no one else wants this shitty job. "alright listen here dipshits" Mr Garrison said, obviously in a awful mood. "Woah who took a crap in his cereal this morning!" Cartman let out an obnoxious laugh at his own joke "Get it you guys? cus he's in a crap mood" he continued laughing which we all ignored, I guess no one was up for his bullshit today.

No one likes the fact that i'm still dating Wendy, they all tell me to dump her because shes a whore or whatever, and I know that, I know she's changed but I can't bring myself to admit it and leave her. She was my first love even though it's really toxic and we are constantly yelling at each other. She always leaves me and then begs me to take her back because 'she's changed and she would never do it again because seeing me hurt is the worst thing ever' blah blah blah. I'm afraid change is quite far out of her reach. She's just sort of poison now, she got popular and let it consume her into an asshole. The smart, passionate and loving girl I once fell in love with vanished so quickly, she's homophobic now too which is quite a shock, and so so 'great' considering i'm bisexual, I haven't came out though I'm dealing with a lot as it is.

I must've zoned out because Kyle was beside me and nudging at my shoulder "Hey Stan, the bell went already, class is over" he said with a concerned smile. I smiled back hoping it'll ease his concern a bit, I stood up and walked with him out of class.