The Assistant (english)

11.

!!!TW: MENTION OF ABORTION, ETC...!!!

I wake up just now. Kaydi lies beside me, snuggled in her blanket. I turn to her and pull her closer to me. I wrap my arms around her, resting my head on her shoulder.

-POV Kaydi-

I wake up in Hellie's arms. She lies with her head on me, looking downward. I continue pretending to sleep, but I observe what she does.

"Well, hello there, little being inside," Hellie places one of her hands on my stomach and lightly strokes up my top.

If you look closely, you can even see a very slight bulge already, but only if you know it.

"What should I do, huh?" She asks. Of course, she gets no answer.

"Mia suggested I should talk to her calmly today, but how? I don't even know how to proceed myself..." I raise my hand slightly and stroke Hellie's tousled hair with it. She lifts her head and looks at me for a while before taking a deep breath and then resting her head in the crook of my neck.

I feel her crying and turn onto my side. She lays on her back and looks up at me from below, as I lean over her slightly. I wipe her tear away and kiss her.

"Do you even want it?" I ask after we part.

"What do you mean?" She asks.

"Well. A little, own, unwanted family. You, me, and a child. Of course, Nell and Billy are included, but... like this. Something of our own..."

"I don't know myself. I never really wanted to get involved with anything again, after Tim, but with you... I don't know, but with you, it feels so tangible and realistic. I would be a mom again and get a second chance as a family, but I know how it came about, and you would be reminded of it again and again..."

"We can terminate it and have me artificially inseminated in a year or two, or whatever method we choose. We don't have to get exactly that being..."

"But then you'd have to abort it, and whether you can live with that, I don't know."

"Hellie Darling... if you say it's too much for you, then we'll end the pregnancy and do it when you feel ready, okay? I found out 12 hours ago that I'm pregnant and haven't formed any attachment to the child yet. The decision is only about you, okay? About whether you're ready. And if you say no, then I'll accept that, okay? So?"

"But if we abort, then you'll be-"

"No, Darling... Yes or no?"

"No..." She whispers softly. Tears come again, and she quickly turns away.

"Why are you crying?" I ask and pull her close to me.

"What if it doesn't work out later? What if we regret it and feel guilty forever?" She asks.

"We'll go to a pregnancy termination counseling center tomorrow. They'll answer all questions as best they can and explain everything to us, okay? Until then, let's just have a great day." I give her a kiss and pull her out of bed.

"Alright. Are you making an appointment?" I just nod in response, so she goes to wake up the kids. I get dressed in the meantime and call there.

She knows right away what's going on, through the media, and also has a free appointment. I ask Mia if she can watch the kids during that time, which she naturally agrees to.

"Are you ready? Because there's food ready." I ask the two children. Helena and I made breakfast. Now she's downstairs finishing up, and I'm getting the kids.

"Yesssss," they both shout simultaneously. We go downstairs together and eat.

"By the way, tomorrow at 12 o'clock, you'll be picked up by your dad. I heard Mia has something really great planned." I inform the two of them. They're naturally thrilled. Helena also smiles gratefully at me, as she won't have to talk to Tim.

-Two weeks later-

So here I am now. I spent the last two weeks in the hospital for examination. Helena and I decided to terminate the pregnancy. The surgery went very well, according to the chief physician. There were some postpartum bleeding, but firstly, they're normal, and secondly, they weren't as bad as they might sound.

"Miss? Your wife is here," a voice pulls me out of my thoughts. Hellie comes over to me and greets me. She takes a bag from me and walks out with me hand in hand.

Of course, the media are there again. We decided not to tell anyone for now. They'll figure it out eventually. Hellie said the two weeks were tough because everyone thought something really bad had happened. After all, they hadn't seen me anymore, and Helena was always alone everywhere.

Arriving home, we unpack my things and then lie down on the sofa.

It's Saturday, and Tim has the kids for the weekend, which means we're alone. Of course, the dogs are there, but that's nothing new.

"How are you feeling?" Hellie asks. I lie on the sofa with my head in Hellie's lap.

"Very well. I have no guilt or anything like that. Everything's normal... How about you?"

"It's weird. It was the right decision, yes, but it's still so surreal." I just nod understandingly.

"It'll probably stay that way for a while," I guess. She just nods in agreement. We watch another movie and discuss important appointments, as I'm still her assistant, before we go up to our bed, where we fall asleep cuddled up to each other.