Adelines pov:
the end of the school day was approaching as i grabbed my things the teacher started letting us go to the gym.
i wasnt about to sit in the gym waiting on my bus, so i started walking home. even though it was pouring down rain but i didnt care.
when i got there, my sweet, loving parents left me a note.
"me and your father are gonna be in vegas for the following week"
great. i take my shoes off and walk towards my room.
the thoughts are still pounding my head, i need to get my mind off things, so i do the resaonable thing and go to my messages.
messages pov:
Adeline: hunter i need you rn
Hunter: im at a job interview..
Adeline: and im in my bed ready.
Hunter: im on my way love.
End of messages pov, Adelines pov:
i take a deep breath and change into the lingerie he had previsouly bought me.
it was still pouring down rain, i turned my lights to red and was about to lay back down until i heard the doorbell.
i walked downstairs and opend the door.
infront of me was a soaking wet hunter, litteraly he was drenched in water.
"hunter! why are you-"
"you said you needed me now, i ran."
"in the rain?!"
"yes Adeline, in the rain. just to satisfy my girl."
my face started to heat up as he waisted no time slaming me up against the front door, causing my back to close it.
(WARING!! MENTIONS OF SEXUAL ENCOUTER)
his lips crushed into mine making me gasp quietly, my hands finding their way into his hair tugging at the perfect damp curls, messing them up even more.
he tapped my leg signaling me to jump and i did so. the then carried me to my kitchen counter and let his hands rest on my thighs as he wasted no time in covering my neck with bite marks and hickeys.
this is getting boring, its not going fast enough. i NEED this off my mind now.
"hunter.."
he took the hint and slipped his fingers underneath the lingerie and slowly entered his finger into me. he continued to kiss my neck, my thoughts begining to blur into just pleasure. just as i thought they would.
he started to pump his finger faster, adding another. at this point i was making loud noises and he seemed to enjoy them. he loves it when i moan out his name.
"hunter~"
that only seemed to fuel his desire as he added another making me moan out louder, sweat beads were forming on my fourhead. i was getting closer to my climax.
"hunter~ im close.."
he smirked hearing my voice becoming more desperate. he pulled his fingers out and layed me down on the kitchen table, unbuttoning his pants and started pushing it inside of me making my back arch and moan louder.
"fuck.. your so tight mi tesoro"
he started to thrust in and out of me at a slow pace, slowly building his pace faster and faster with each thrust.
i was getting closer and closer to my climax with each thrust into me, each one making my mind foggy, making me clench the kicthen table corner harder.
with one last thrust i came instantly with a loud groan.
hunter pulled out of me and came on my stommach.
we were both panting and sweating.
"such a good girl for me Adeline."
"you should go hunter, my parents will be back soon."
"but-"
"hunter."
"fine. ill go."
i was lying through my teeth, but i didnt care. i felt gross and dirty. he left thru the front door after dressing himself back.
my eyes filled with tears as i started to regret it so much.
my mind feeling with hatred and disgus as i ran into my room and cleaned myself up. i put on a hoodie and shorts before getting back into my bed and turning my headphones on and played music.
i layed there in my bed staring at the ceiling before i drifted off to sleep, with red puffy eyes.
the next morning when i woke up i instantly took a shower after looking at myself in the mirror feeling disgusted. i got into the shower and scrubed my skin harshly, trying to forget last night completly. i got out of the shower and got dressed.
i went into the kitchen and made a bowl of ceral but didnt eat much. i went back into my room and just layed there. no tv, no music, i just layed there on my floor and sobbed. i needed something to release all this pain, this anger. but i had no idea on how to do that.
(MENTIONS OF SELF HARM!!)
so i just grabbed my blade and started to form cuts on my wrist. i was laughing, just cuttng away and then the pain kicked in. all at once and i was crying. i went to wipe the blood off and put bandages on the cuts. i looked at my self in the mirror and wonderd
how could anyone love me? how could anyone actually look at me and think "shes pretty?"
now.. the guilt was setting in. the fear was kicking in. the thought of someone seeing the cuts, the thought that i actally cut myself again. i was 4 days clean. im such a fucking failure.
i looked away from the mirror and just melted into the bathroom floor, sobbing into my hands wishing i didnt have to go through this pain.
why did god hate me so much.. is there even a god?
and i started to pray.
"god, if your really real.. why would you let me suffer likee this why would you let me go through all this fucking pain? what did i do to deserve this? i was always a good kid.. my parents are just actually horrible.. so if your there god.. help me, please."
and then i got up thinking about how stupid that was and tried to finish the rest of my soggy ceral but i couldnt so i just washed it down the drain.
something in life that i wish i would've know when i was younger is that no matter how hard you try to get better.. it never really works.
oml this chapter was emotional because it hit close to home. to anyone that reads this, know you are loved. if anyone needs to talk, im always here <3
YOU ARE READING
what I wish I said
Acak"sometimes the worst place you can be, is in your own head" Adeline was going to in person school for the first time in 2 years since having to be taken out for mental health reasons. she has had a horrible childhood because of her abusive parents a...
