Once a pon a time there was a human called big black human. Big black human was a very humany human. He looooooooooooooooooooooooves little children (he's a babysitter) and they make him very very happy :). Perchance. But one day, (scrreeeeeeeeaqaaaach). There was a plane that was flying and hit the world trade center😱😱😱. Womp womp big black human ran in to save the kids. But the . kids were never seen again😭😭😭. Big black human will be born in 1984 and died in 1762🤔🤔🤔. Anyways , back to the black story. GUN FIRE GUN FIRE GUNFIRE. Phew it was all a dream, MARTIN LUTHEr KING, (former president). GET DOWN MISTER PRESIDENT SHOUTEd big black human. *KABLING* As the bullet soars through the air. *CLINKACHONGA* . Scatman? THe present has been saved (president). WhipLASH. No, big black human HE"S been SHOT. "If I don't make it
tell the kids that I love them." Big black human mutters as the blood gushes.
2 months later
"Whe- Where am I?" You were shot saving Mr president. "One question" Big black human stutters trying to put his words together. "Di- d- did I look BADASS well doing it" THe nurse sighs with her head down "FUCK YEA."
3 Months previously
My mother died when I was born, I miss her dearly. my favourite memory was when she taught me how to ride a bike. Just last week I went to her house and we had some tea to gether. My father on the other hand, Ive never met that old geezer. He said "fuck it, we ball" then dipped. My mother told me at a young age that he was an evil man. All I remember was he was bold af, about 5"10 and had dark brown hair. *neeeeeeeow*, OH NO 😱😱😱 there's a third plain; *KABANGALANGADINGDONG* it was heading for the pentagon but crashed into that field next to the orphanage (9/11 reference?🤔?🤔?🤔 or as the foreigners call it 11/9 (Brexit?) ). Perhaps, Big Black human can save the day, he asks his really smart, handsome, intelligent, clever, dashing, astute, wise, charming, bright, sharp, polished, brainy, attractive and quick-witted friend "Math Guy" for some help 😍😱. Math guy says, I gotcha. He pulls his time machine out his his back right pocket. Big black human in a flash swipes it out of Math guy's majestic hands and click the pocket watch looking object. *WALAWALAOUULUU* (It becomes the previous day). Big Black Human knows what must be done. He puts on his crocs (in sports mode) and makes a dash towards the airport. As he's heading to the airport, someone in front of him DOESN'T hold the door open for him 😡💢💢😡. "I hope you eat a brick die in a ditch." The man turns around. The large black human face dropped, his stomach dropped so far down, people in china can feel the tremors of his unease. Father Dearest?👉🥺👈 "Yes son" he mutters. *WALLAWALLALONGPONG* the sound echos after Big Black Human Thundercunts his father across the terminal and down the escalator𓊍. Nevertheless, Big Black Human bolts towards the plane, he runs up the plane and breaks through the window and bellows "I HAVE A BOMB." The plane drops silent. Turns out Big Black Human was on the wrong plane and the other plane had already taken off. "Whoopsie Daisy." He leaves in despair. I CBF saving those people, Big Black human traversed back to his house. *Opens door to his house* "How was your day" Big Black human's mother asked. Pretty normal I guess. He heads to bed but accidentally drinks an entire bottle of malibu as get's absolutely fucked (A totally relatable situation that I'm sure most people can relate to) and decides he's had enough for that day.
Zzzzzzzzzz...
PART 2?
