Echoes of a Fractured Mind.

Chapter one.

."How have your symptoms been affecting your daily life and relationships lately?" Oscar's therapist asked. He didn't understand what was so good about therapy, because all it was, was him paying about fifty dollars to have a woman ask him things and tell him what to do with his life, as if she knew how to help. Oscar sighed, "I.. I don't.." He struggled to find the words to say, or, he struggled to tell the woman the truth. "I guess it's hard to focus. I had to quit my job because I kept lashing out at people and other stuff.." He mumbled, avoiding eye  contact. Another thing that made him feel like this therapy was a waste of money was the fact that it made him feel.. weak, and vulnerable. It felt like she was subtly belittling him and he  didn't like it, he didn't even know her and he was telling her stuff that he hadn't even told his best friend. Oscar felt like she was manipulating him, trying to make him seem like he was crazier than he was.. She probably wanted to send him to an insane asylum so he could rot away with the other criminally insane people, but he wasn't criminally insane, right?

"That sounds tough. Are you taking any medication for your illness? Because if not, I definitely recommend." The therapist spoke again and Oscar could feel a growl rising up in his throat. He was frustrated, he barely had enough money to talk to her, so why would he have enough to buy medication? She had to be teasing him, because if not why would she ask such a stupid question. "I don't have enough money to.." Oscar's throat tightened, he felt weak and he hated the pitiful stare she gave him. The therapist gave Oscar a small and sad smile, "it's fine. I know how hard it is to get money without a job, maybe I could help you find one..?" He frowned, why did everyone want to solve his problems? Sure, sometimes he needed help, but just because he was mentally ill didn't mean he needed help all the time. "I'm fine. You've helped enough." Oscar didn't mean to make his tone as aggressive as it was, but it seemed to have made her back down and not ask again or say anything. "Well.." She spoke, sucking her teeth. "I think that should put an end to our session today.. unless, there's anything you want to say or ask. You don't have to do this alone Oscar." He grumbled and stretched his legs before he left the room.
                                            *+*+*

Oscar sat on his front porch. He was going to call his best friend, Max, over. Though he considered himself to be a lone wolf, he seemed to get rather tense when he wasn't talking to Max or being around him. He pulled up Max's number and for some reason, hesitated before calling him. He heard Max's voice before calling him, though it was  faint and he knew it was in his head. Oscar recognized what he was saying, it was from a past conversation. Probably from a week ago when he was talking about the latest episode of avatar. (The last Airbender.) Oscar found the chatter strangely comforting, and then proceeded to press the call button. He put his phone to his ear and felt a little nervous as Max answered. "Yes?" His friend's voice had a nice soft ring to it, it made him want to listen to him talk for hours. "Hey Max.. wanna come over? I'm really bored." Oscar found himself smiling as he waited for his friend's response. "Ehh.. why not? I gotta make sure your emo ass doesn't commit." He joked morbidly, though Oscar didn't find himself smiling. He kinda took it a little personally, because once again someone was caring for  him, like he was still a kid and once again, did he feel weak.. pitiful. The thought rang in his head, a thought that he didn't think and one that didn't belong to him. He chuckled nervously, trying to brush off the thought and Max's joke. "Yup." He sighed, then as he went to say goodbye, he felt his words get caught in his throat. This was definitely new, and a bit overwhelming. "I.. I'll see you." He spoke meekly. "Yeah, I love you, bye." Oscar found himself blushing at his friend's words. "Um.." he didn't know what to follow up with, so he just hung up and went inside of his house.

★Just a quick note, I'm not actually schizophrenic myself but I am mentally ill, though, I thought I knew enough about the illness and how it affects people to start working on this. If I make anything cringe or misinform anyone about anything, don't be afraid to tell me 🙏 I'm up for constructive criticism, especially from people with the illness ♡ as always, don't forget to vote and possibly leave a comment. ★