Meet You By The Tree

A recent conversation with a dear friend made me think that although we live in a world that has never been so interconnected, many others and I have never felt so disconnected.

Are we now paying the price for yesterday's wishes? After all, you should be careful about what you wish for, right?

Living in a world where you no longer wait for anything and patience is no longer a virtue, should it come as any surprise?

My parents used to say, "Good things come to those who wait." As I approach Chapter 39 of my life, I reflect upon those words more and more. Every time I say them, I reach a further and much deeper understanding.

How did patience become the ultimate inconvenience?

Technology has improved our lives in many cases but not so in many others. We are now starting to see the ultimate trade-offs for our choices. For every benefit you can list, there is always a trade-off that accompanies it.

A few years ago, right around the time I was diagnosed, I ventured back out into the world for the very first time. I hadn't seen anybody, let alone interacted with them for ages. I no longer knew how. It was kind of my "lost gettin' found" type of moment. Only he knows all the hell I had to go through.

I had also taken a lengthy sabbatical from social media because of all the shit I had going on...

That alone was very refreshing and reminded me of what life used to be like, and it made me realise there was life before and beyond it (maybe).

I stepped out into my local town, accompanied by my eldest son. We were walking about (me hobbling) and watching the world go buy (intentional spelling error, name of future article and hyperlink). Then, out of nowhere, a female voice screeched my name from afar.

Although somewhat confused, I quickly realised who it was. It was an old friend from school who I hadn't seen since the day we left. That was about the best part of a quarter of a century ago.

We lived on the same estate and used to walk to school and back home together. At the time, I probably saw her as a sister-like figure.

Despite talking with each other extensively on social media over the years and being overjoyed to see me, I didn't feel the same towards her.

Sure, I was excited to see her, but something was missing. There was no mystery and, therefore, certainly no suspense to any of it.

Due to my social media addiction, all potential avenues of conversation had already been exhausted, and I had not physically said a word. I/it felt awkward...

I already knew her story, and she already knew mine. We couldn't keep each other guessing. It quickly made me realise that's what makes life interesting: the unknown. The relativity of knowing is not to know. That is the magic sauce in all of this...

Despite what the archaic education system wants you to believe, not knowing and being wrong are integral parts of life. It's healthy.

Except, in this case, I did. I knew everything. She had become an open book, metaphorically speaking. Had I become the same? Is this what modern technology has done to us both?

Since leaving school, I had only seen her life through digital pictures. All that time had elapsed since then, and I did not have a true, visceral grasp of who this person was. How did we let all of that go? How did we let life get that busy?

I had this empty and hollow feeling of immense sadness that was almost tactile.

It made me think of all the people, all the friends and family I have lost due to my staunch polarising and political views on all things social media. I was labelled a renegade and a charlatan. But I had warned them this coming. I saw it in my rearview.