manifesto of someone who does not like math

math is the "best" (the work of the devil)

Math was an asshole. A bitch. A piece of shit. That's what you thought, at least. All of the teachers absolutely loved him for some godforsaken reason.

You couldn't understand why Math was such a a teacher's pet. You and him had gone to school together your entire lives and to you, he was just an annoying dickhead. 
   
When you first met in elementary school, he wasn't so bad. Back then, you could actually understand Math. Hell, you might even go so far as to say you liked him.

That made his sudden transition into a nonsensical mysterious being who seemed to only exist to torture you even more painful.

Math and his annoying friends were always making fun of you for not understanding him. But how were you supposed to? He was constantly making up new things now, it was impossible to keep up.

He even started using letters. He was supposed to be the numbers guy for Christ sake.

That wasn't even the worst thing he'd started doing. Everything Math did now was so nonsensical you couldn't even list the nonsense he did because you couldn't understand it, much less explain it.

You couldn't stand Math. You wanted nothing more than to just get rid of him already. You wanted him gone so you'd never have to deal with him again.

It was at that moment that you made your decision. You were going to do it. You were going to kill Math.

Getting up from your bed, you inhaled deeply and prepared yourself for what you were about to do.

                                     ---

You didn't even have a plan. You were just walking straight to Math's house that you for some reason had the address of for plot reasons.

Once you were at your destination, you felt your feet guide you to the backyard where you then climbed into the window.

Nervously, you bent down and started tiptoeing towards Math's room.

When you got to his door, you shakily grabbed the door knob and swung the door open as quietly as you could.

You walked over to Math's bed where he was sleeping. Since you came here without any plan, you had no weapon with you. Initially you just told yourself you'd cross that bridge when you got there. But now that you were there you feared that you'd fall into the river trying cross over it on your shitty makeshift bridge.

You pushed those thoughts away though. You needed to do this.

Gulping, you grabbed one of the pillows on Math's bed and pressed it against his face as hard as you could.

He woke up and started struggling against you but you pressed harder. Eventually, he stopped struggling and went limp.

You pulled back, panting, and felt a smile creep over your face. You did it.

                                        ---

The next day, you went to school like normal.

All of the teachers were heartbroken, clearly grieving Math. You couldn't have any less sympathy.

Because you didn't even try to cover up the fact that you killed Math, everyone knew it was you. Nobody besides the teachers cared about Math though so they didn't bother arresting you.

Your classmates, all of whom hated Math as much as you did, now loved you. You became the most popular person at your school and eventually girlbossed your way into becoming the leader of the world because if there's one thing that brings everyone together it's the fact that nobody likes Math.