Always Running (MATURE CONTENT)

CHAPTER 28

RUN. Her first instinct was to run when she felt hurt. She wanted to grab her things and run as far and as fast as she could. She had been out of line asking Reagan if she had slept with Lucas. She knew she had made another mistake. She wanted to run before Tom could call her and tell her that Lucas wanted to cut off all communication with her like last time she had screwed up. She needed to run to be in control of her life again.

Since she knew she couldn't run she did the next best thing. She took her personal guard with her and went for a ride. Maggie picked Blake and Ryder up at the park and then they kept on driving. Nessa stayed silent throughout the road trip they were on. Her phone rang again and again and Nessa let it go to voicemail. She didn't want to talk to Lucas. She had been wrong, and she knew it and she apologized for it, even after that he had been an asshole. He had spoken to her in a cold manner and she didn't like that. He had never spoken to her like that...except when he had dismissed her. He had spoken to her that way.

FEAR. Nessa's fear gripped her heart again. She was afraid he would dismiss her again to teach her a lesson. She wanted to trust him. She just couldn't bring herself to trust him completely. She had been broken beyond repair and he knew that when he got involved with her. she was afraid that the progress they had made the last month and a half was gone.

"Nessa." Ryder's gentle voice brought her out of her rambling thoughts. "Lilian wants to know if you are going home tonight."

HOME. That was a word that never felt right rolling off her tongue. She had never had a home until she had met Lucas. He had become her home and at that moment she was upset with her home, so no, she would not be going home.

"Tell her I'm fine and that I'm not running, but no, I'm not going home today." Nessa turned her head and looked out the window. The tears she had been fighting found their way down her cheeks. She felt both Blake and Ryder's hands on her shoulders soothing her aching heart.

"What happened?" Blake asked, sitting forward.

"What always happens...I screwed up." Nessa's voice wavered with emotion.

"Look at the bright side," Ryder added also sitting forward. "At least you're not running...not alone anyway."

Nessa laughed and shook her head. There was that, she wasn't running, but she wasn't going home either. She was in limbo.

Maggie had decided to take Nessa to the beach. She had parked the car close to the sand and they all had walked to the shore. Nessa walked along the shoreline enjoying the waves crashing on the sand and washing over her feet.

"Lucas has called ten times the last hour," Maggie said. She still had her shoes on. They all had insisted that her guard had to always be ready to protect her and being shoeless was not being ready.

"Tell him to stop calling or I'll take longer going back." Nessa looked out over the horizon. The sun began to set, and she could have sworn the sun sizzled as it went down and touched the edge of the water.

"Nessa." Maggie interrupted her quiet time once again.

"No, Maggie, I don't want to talk to him tell him I—"

"You're bleeding," Maggie cut her off, pointing at her legs.

Nessa looked down and saw blood on her leg. Tears stung her eyes immediately.

"The baby," she whispered as she froze where she stood afraid to even move. No. Not again, she thought as Maggie called for Blake to come quickly.

Blake took her in his arms and carried her as fast as possible to the car. He placed her in the back seat and they all piled in. Maggie sat in the back with her while Ryder drove. Blake sat in the passenger seat and dialed Lucas' number.