Undercover Lovers

1

6/7/24

"if you woulda listened to me Y/n, we wouldn't be here." my mother scolds from across the dinner table. 

"well maybe if you weren't such a helicopter parent" i mumble under my breath. 

"Im not a helicopter parent. Im just trying to keep you safe." she retorts.

"Well you know it could be worse. I could be pregnant at 17, and not just Blocking you on social media." I snap

"YOU LIED ABOUT HAVING IT!!" she shouts. 

"No i didn't, i blocked you. plus i knew if i asked, you would say no, and you would want to control it like you always do. that's why you HACKED into it and changed the password." I snap again. 

"BUT YOU LIED TO ME ABOUT IT!" she yellls

"BECAUSE YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO HAVE CONTROL!" i yell, my curly bangs covering my eyes. i pick up my plate and walk it over to the trash, i put my fork in the sink.

"WELL IM YOUR MOTHER! I CAN QUESTION YOU AS MUCH AS I WANT. THIS IS MY HOUSE MY RULES." She continues yelling as i walkt up the stairs. "BUT YOU LEAVE ME IN A FUCKED UP POSITION, BECAUSE I WAS TRYING GIVE YOU YOUR PHONE AGAIN BUT YOU WENT AND FUCKED EVERYTHING UP YET AGAIN!" I make it to the top and pause. 

"Yep I'm always the one fucking shit up." i say as i walk into my bathroom contemplating what to do next. I stare at myself in the mirror. Its not like I lie on a 24/7 basis. She acts like i lie about everything and anything, which i don't. I lie to her when its needed. I didn't lie to her about having it either though,  i just blocked her. 

Ever since i was 14 i had an Instagram account, but the thing is SHE, MY MOM ran it. She was the one posting pictures, she would read all the messages, she would get EVERY notification. It was mine but nothing ever got to me if it didn't get past her. So I made an alt and she didn't know about it. It got hacked. I went and made this new account with my school email and her being how she is she got the email from my SCHOOL EMAIL because that's ALSO hooked to her phone, she saw i made a new account and i was like nah its not mine because i knew she was gonna wanna have full control over it. She figured out that it was mine because she somehow got into the email that i didn't have. She changed the password on that email and my new Instagram account so i couldn't get in. 

I walk out of the bathroom and into my bedroom. I flop down on my bed, uncomfortably numb. I grab my computer and my headphones. I turn on my Lana Del Rey playlist. The first song to play is Norman fucking Rockwell. god i love this song. I drift off listening to Lana Del Reys soothing voice. A few hours pass and i wake up. Its currently 2:35am. I turn on my TV because my computer doesn't have Wifi. My mom controls the Wifi too. It shuts off at 10pm and comes back on at 7am. She'd rather me try to kill myself and no one ever know than me be able to talk to someone. After about 30 minutes of watching something i fall back asleep. 

6/8/24

I wake up at 10:24am.

"Y/n, your father and i are going out." I hear my mother say from the doorway "Ill move my car so Nana can take you and Drew somewhere."

"ok." i rub my eyes. I get up grab my black baggy jeans, a black tank top and a black on black checkered button up. Yes an all black outfit. I walk into my bathroom. 

"alexa play doja cat." 

As doja cat starts playing I take my hello kitty pj pants off, and the tank top i was wearing. I stare at my body in the mirror. Skinny, pale, but not weak. I grab my makeup bag. I put eyeshadow in my top and bottom waterline. I then grab my liquid eyeliner, i make thick black triangles coming off my eyes. it looks symmetrical for once in my life. I spray my hair with tons of water mixed with conditioner. I finger comb my hair and the scrunch it, i do the same with my bangs. I brush my teeth and put some nude lipstick on. i look presentable for once. I walk down stairs to Nanas room.