Secrets

Once upon a time... No. That’s not right. This isn’t a collection of fairytales. This is real life, however much I may wish differently. Every single story has an unhappy ending, every unhappy ending is caused by me. Every file in my letterbox has led to their death, and every death is marked by a rose carved into their skin. It’s gory. It’s sad. Guess what, darling, it’s real life.

When I was little, I was forced to watch as my parents were murdered in front of me. That kind of shit messes anyone up. It sure as hell messed me up. When the Shadows came looking for me, I accepted their proposal thinking that I could get revenge on the bastards who took away my parents and my childhood. In reality, I ended up murdering people. It doesn’t really matter if they had done anything wrong or not, their deaths still made me a murderer.

I lived a privileged life in my childhood. I was the only child of two adoring parents. I lived in a safe neighbourhood, I went to a good quality school. I had a little puppy, Lily. I didn’t know the meaning of the words pain or misfortune. It was an amazing life. If my parents hadn’t been murdered, I probably would have grown up like they had. Graduated school, gone to university, fallen in love, got married, had children, watched them grow up. Actually, now that I think about it, my life was quite similar to that. Anyway, it wasn’t a childhood that anyone, including me, would have ever expected to grow into a career like mine, but after the murder, the Shadows came looking for me.

They took me in and taught me the skills I would need in my life. The skills of an assassin. The skills of a killer. I was grateful to them for a long, long time, able to think of the files in my letterbox as just training dummies, rather than real people. They were simply names to me. I never considered that they might have family who would miss them. Friends. Personalities. Troubles that caused them to do the terrible things they were being killed for. Hell, a couple of them weren’t even being killed for a crime. They were being killed for money. Unfortunately, it took me a long time to realize that. I thought I was doing what was right. When I finally figured out the truth, it was too late. This is my job now, and I’m damn good at it.

I was nineteen when I really started to think about what I was doing. By then, I was already a skilled assassin, with multiple targets exterminated. It’s quite sad, really, that in ten short years, I had turned from a carefree little girl to a cold blooded killer, but it was around this time that it struck me that what I was doing was wrong. I still can’t believe that it actually took me that long to work it out, but I suppose denial affects even the best of people. It took me even longer to actually leave the Shadows. They don’t take anyone in lightly, and it’s even harder to get out than it is to get in, but somehow, I managed.

After I left the Shadows, I knew that I would need and alias. I took on a new name, and started to travel around the world. It was easier that way. If you were from another country, no one ever wondered why they had never noticed you. Eventually, with the help of a few contacts from the Shadows, I settled in USA and started to work. I introduced myself as Jaimee Smith, from Australia, and while I was there, I met Thomas Brown. We started dating, and two years ago, we got married. We have one little girl, Natalie. Tom still has no idea who I really am. I’m hoping that he never has to find out.

Just after I started dating Tom, I got back into the assassin job. I still worked as a waitress by day, but killing was, by then, something I knew I was good at. I couldn’t stand the thought of being merely... Average. So I killed. The deaths still weigh on my mind, but I’m not a hypocrite. The lines I haven’t crossed yet, I will try my best to never cross, but to stop killing now would make it seem like I am trying to regain my past, but that past is long gone now. I’ve gone to university now, as well. Tom pushed me into it, and I’m now in charge of a small bakery. Once again, my life is blissful, yet I’m still killing.

I know that some people won’t understand that, but hey, life works in mysterious ways. Once I had started my job without the protection of the Shadows, though, it becomes far harder to quit. I wanted to after Natalie was born, but the people who hire me hold something against me. Actually, they hold two things. That’s all they need. Thomas and Natalie. One will shatter my life, two will completely annihilate it. I can’t risk that. I could never risk my baby, or my husband.

So now I’m stuck. I can’t tell people what I’ve done, I can’t tell people what I’m going to do next, and I never want my family to find out what I do. It’s getting harder everyday. I love my husband, but I think he thinks I’m having an affair. I’m out late at nights, and I get back early in the morning, tired, in the same clothes that I left in the night before. My baby girl is comforted by him in the middle of the night when she wakes up from nightmares, and there’s nothing I can do to get out of it. I don’t know what to do anymore.

My name is Maddi James. I was nine years old when my parents were murdered in front of me. Now, I am known by other names. I am Jaimee to my husband. I am Rose Scar to assassins, and to the media? I am the worlds best killer.

Hi everyone! So, new story. I’m hoping to actually keep this one going, but here’s the thing. I don’t want to be writing, and no one reading. I’m not asking for a number of votes or whatever. I just want one comment giving me feedback, please (so, really, I’m asking for a minimum number of comments :P) Then I’ll post the next chapter. It’ll carry on like that. Also, if you have any ideas for Maddi/Jaimee and her story, send me a pm and I’ll see what I can do. Thanks!