Mushoku Tensei: Jobless Reincarnation - Volume 3

Chapter 1: The Con Artist Who Claimed to Be a God

"Some things I can do easily, but you can't do at all.
And some things you do effortlessly, I could never manage.That's all there is to it."—Look, getting a job is hard, okay? -Rudeus Greyrat

***

I was dreaming.

In this dream, I was soaring through the air, holding Eris in my arms. My mind was hazy, but somehow I knew that I was flying. The world around me was a constantly changing blur of shapes and colors. I rocketed through the air like a soundwave or particle of light, my body randomly bouncing in different directions.

I didn't know why this was happening. But I was certain of one thing: no matter what I tried, I was going to lose speed eventually, and plunge to the ground.

So I concentrated. I looked at the ever-shifting scenery below us, trying to find a relatively safe place to land.

Why did I feel the need to do this? Good question. Something inside me was just screaming that I had to, if I wanted to survive.

Still, we were going way too fast. It was like staring into the reels of a slot machine, except everything was moving much, much faster. Focusing more intently, I gathered magical energy into my eyes...and for just a moment, we suddenly slowed down.

Oh crap. I'm gonna fall.

Panic welled in my chest, but I could now see the land below me clearly. I needed to find a field. Falling into the sea or smashing into a mountain wouldn't be good. Forests were obviously dangerous, but if I managed to aim for a field...

I forced myself downward, hoping for the best. Our velocity slowed rapidly as I plunged toward a reddish-brown stretch of earth.

An instant later, I lost consciousness.

***[Elsewhere]***

When I opened my eyes, I found myself in a pure white void. I immediately knew this wasn't real. It had to be some sort of lucid dream. Yet, for some reason, my body felt oddly heavy.

"Huh?"

I looked down at myself, and my eyes went wide. I was back in the old, familiar form l'd spent thirty-four years in.

At the sight of it, memories of my previous life came flooding back. I was the same bitter, vile, insecure, and selfish piece of trash I'd always been. The ten years I spent as Rudeus suddenly felt like nothing more than a dream.

A crushing wave of disappointment washed over me. I'd reverted to my pathetic, former self, and I found that fact all too easy to accept.

So it really was just a dream, huh...?

As dreams go, it lasted an awfully long time. But at the end of the day, it was too good to be true. I'd been born into a loving family, and managed to get friendly with some very cute girls. Not a bad ten years by any means. I'd wanted to enjoy that life a little more, though.

Oh well. Guess it's over now.

I could feel the memories of my time as Rudeus beginning to fade. Once you've woken up, even the best of dreams melt away in no time.

Had I really expected anything different? Please. A smooth, happy life like that was never in the cards for a guy like me.

***

Eventually, I noticed that a weirdo had appeared in front of me. The individual in question had a blank, white face, marked only by a big, wide grin.