falling for 13 || Johnny Kavanagh

Prologue

G R A C E

The Tommen College uniform felt strange in my hands, the crest heavy with everything it stood for. Most kids wearing it had parents who paid for every last stitch. But not me. I got here on a scholarship—something that felt more like a spotlight than a blessing. Clara, Aoibh, and Orlaith were all headed to Tommen too. Their parents didn't blink at the tuition. They were excited, chatting about boys and who they'd sit with at lunch, like this was the start of some grand adventure. For them, maybe. But for me?

I was just trying to survive.

"Grace! You coming or what?" Darren's voice broke through my thoughts from downstairs.

I glanced at the mirror, trying to imagine the girl staring back belonged at Tommen. My golden brown hair was tied up in a loose ponytail, and my pale blue eyes looked back at me like they were questioning everything. The blazer hung a little loose on my shoulders, but I didn't have time to care. Not when today meant facing the unknown. The uniform, the school, the new people—it all felt too big.

Too much.

Clara had texted me earlier, "Meet us at the gates! We can go in together xoxo." That was a relief. At least I wouldn't be alone. Still, I couldn't shake the feeling that this wasn't my world. I wasn't here because I was like them—I was here because I didn't have a choice.

"GRACE!" Darren shouted again, a little more impatient this time.

I grabbed my bag and rushed down the stairs, my stomach twisting like it always did when I was late. Darren stood by the front door, leaning casually against the frame. His grin was wide, carefree—like everything in his life came easy. I envied that about him sometimes, the way he could brush things off.

"You look ready to take on the world," he teased, reaching to ruffle my hair.

I ducked out of the way, rolling my eyes. "Stop, Darren."

"Relax," he said, nudging my arm lightly. "You're going to be fine. You belong there, Grace."

Belong. The word felt foreign, almost bitter. Mam had cried when she found out I got the scholarship. She'd hugged me so tight I could barely breathe, whispering that I was special, that I could make something of myself. But then Dad had come home from the pub, and the reality of our life crashed back down. He hadn't said a word about Tommen, no, instead he used his palm to talk. He'd barely looked at me, like I was invisible. Or worse, like I wasn't worth the time it took to acknowledge me.

Darren, though, had always been different. He'd picked me up when Dad's silence got too heavy, Joey too, cracking jokes and telling me how smart I was. He'd been my shield from the worst of it for as long as I could remember.

I followed Darren out to the car, the bright September morning doing nothing to calm the storm inside me. The drive to Tommen was short but felt endless, the closer we got, the more anxious I became.

"What if I don't fit in?" I finally asked, my voice quieter than I intended.

Darren glanced over, his hands relaxed on the steering wheel. "You'll be fine. You've got Clara, Aoibh, and Orlaith. And you're smart as hell, Grace. You earned your spot there, don't forget that."

I nodded, though it didn't quite sink in. The gates of Tommen College loomed ahead, their size as intimidating as the reputation the school held. Rugby stars and the best of the best passed through these gates, and I couldn't shake the feeling that I was an imposter among them.

We pulled up to the curb, and my heart thudded in my chest. Clara waved from the gate, standing with Aoibh and Orlaith, all of them looking far more comfortable than I felt.

"This is it," Darren said, turning to face me. His usual grin was gone, replaced by something softer, more serious. "You've got this."

I looked at him, swallowing the lump in my throat. For a second, I wanted to tell him everything—how scared I was, how out of place I felt, how much I didn't want to go home and deal with Dad after this. But the words didn't come.

"Thanks," I muttered instead, grabbing my bag.

He reached over and squeezed my shoulder. "Anytime, sis."

"I'll see you later, yeah?" I asked, Darren didn't reply, something in the air felt different, heavy. I pushed the feeling down, shaking it off as I stepped out of the car. Clara, Aoibh, and Orlaith were already waiting, and I needed to focus on them. On this first day. On anything but the creeping sense that something was off.

I waved to Darren as I walked toward the gates, watching as he drove off. The car disappeared down the road, and a cold shiver ran through me.

Little did I know, that would be the last time I'd see him.