The gamble of love

9

Jo's POV

I spent most of the day with the girls. The guys were doing their own thing which I was thankful for, I don't have the strength to face Charles yet.
The afternoon went by quick. It is currently 6pm and time for dinner. We all join at the table and I go to sit next to Rebecca, Charles sitting down opposite me. I can feel his eyes on me, but I choose to ignore him.
"Charles, can't you and Rebecca switch seats please? I miss my girl." Carlos says with a pouty face and I roll my eyes seeing Charles smirk. "Yeah sure thing mate" he says standing up and walking over to sit down next to me. We are waiting for them to bring the food out and Carlos and Rebecca as well as Lando and Magui were having their own conversations.
"Jo, can we talk later?" Charles whispers very softly over to me. I look at him and just nod my head. "I really am sorry" he says placing his hand on my thigh underneath the table. I get shivers from his touch. I look at him making a face to say that he needs to stop. I don't want anyone to notice anything. He looks at me smirking, moving his hand up and underneath my dress. I lightly kick him under the table but that does not stop him, he keeps moving his hand upwards, now tucking at my underwear. I feel my cheeks heating up from his touch. He tries to move my underwear to the side touching me. I gasp. Everbody instantly looks at me as I feel Charles remove his hand. "Are you okay?" Magui asks me. "Oh, uh, I, yes I'm fine, thought I felt a bug on me." I lie and see Lando looking at Charles with an angry glare. Uhgg can this possibly get any worse.

We all enjoyed our meal and the group was sitting outside chatting. "I think I am gonna turn in, I am feeling really tired." I tell them. They all said goodnight to me and I make my way to my room. On my way there, I was pulled by my arm into somebody's room. I turn around looking straight into Lando's eyes. "What the hell?" I ask him. "Sorry, I just needed to get you alone." He says. "Uhm, why?" I ask confused. He stays silent. "Is this about Magui again?" I ask him sitting down on his bed.
"Yeah sort of.." he says quietly. "Lan, what's wrong you are making me worry?" I tell him and he looks at me. It looks like he is about to cry. "Did something happen?" I ask him again. "Yeah, well, she wanted something to happen. I just couldn't." He says. "Why?" I ask him. "You" he bluntly answered. My eyes widen. "Lando, we talked about this." I say. "I know, I just can't get you out of my head. The idea of anybody's hands on you drives me insane." He states. "Lando, please don't-" and before I could finish my sentence he smashes his lips against mine.
I should have stopped him, but I didn't. I kissed him back. Why do I feel different this time? Why am I letting this happen?
I quickly come to my senses and pull away. "Lando, you can't keep doing this!" I yell at him lightly. "You can't tell me that you feel nothing for me Jo, stop lying to yourself." He says. "I'm inlove with Charles. Lando this ends here. Please don't ruin this for me."
I tell him. "So you don't have any feelings for me?" He asked. I open my mouth to speak, but the words wouldn't come out. "That's what I thought." He says.
"I can't do this Lan, I'm sorry." I say getting up and walking out the door. I run over to my room and break down in tears. What the hell is wrong with me.

I get my phone out and call Taylor. I need her right now. She answered soon after sounding asleep. "Tay, did I wake you?" I ask her crying. "It's fine babe, what's going on?" She asked sounding panicked. "It's a mess over here. I need you." I say sobbing. "Jo, calm down. What happened?" She asks. "Me and Charles had an argument because he is jealous of Lando. I assured him that nothing was going on between me and Lando. Next thing I know I am in Lando's room and he is kissing me. I don't know what I am doing. Everything is messed up and I am feeling all these things and I don't know what to do anymore." I say crying hysterically.
"Oh babe, I'm so sorry, I wish I could give you a big hug right now. Everything will work out as it should, just know that. Do you have feelings for Lando again?" She asked me confused. "I don't know, I think so. I don't know what I am feeling." I tell her.
"Well if you had to choose between Charles and Lando at this exact moment, who would you want to comfort you?" She asks. "Lando" I blurt out, even surprising myself. "But I think it's only because I've known him for so long." I say. "Who are you more attracted to physically?" She asks. I know she is asking me all these questions to help me calm down and help my mind decide what it actually wants, I know she is just trying to help me, so I go along with it, knowing she would never judge me. "Both" I answered honestly. "Emotionally?" She asks. "Charles" I reply. "If they were both to ask you, who would you go on a proper first date with?" She asks. "Charles" I reply once again. "Who suits your personality better?" Another question comes. "Lando" I say. She wanted to ask another question but I stopped her. "This is confusing me even more, Tay. I know you are trying to help but this is not working." I say  "I'm so sorry babe, I wish I could make it better for you." She says sincerely. We talked for a while until I calmed down and then we said goodnight. I was about to go take a shower when I heard a knock on the door. It's Charles. "Baby are you okay?" He asks me concerned. "Charles, I'm really sorry, I can't do this right now, can we please talk tomorrow?" I ask him. He slowly nods his head. I give him an awkward hug and then he leaves looking more confused than ever.
I am messing up big time.