Tails: Kakashi Hatake is all of these, and generally a pretty relaxed guy for someone raised as a ninja assassin.
Luigi: You wouldn't know it at first glance that his childhood sucked balls. Like when his dad committed seppuku... because he saved his friends instead of prioritizing a mission.
Tails: In the shadow of disgrace, this cruel methodology of the ninja and his father's great mistake tore young Kakashi apart.
Luigi: Reminds me of what happened in Season 5?
Tails: What was the great mistake.
Luigi: Well... it's the ending of Overhaul VS Diavolo.
Tails: Oh... Yeah... But we corrected in Gohan's battle a sin the aftermath the death was rewritten and she escaped.
Luigi: Awesome does that mean Mark's alive.
Tails: Nope.
Luigi: Goddamnit.
Tails: Anyway, despite his hardship, Kakashi proved himself a prodigy, becoming a Genin at age five, a Chunin at age six, and a Jonin at age twelve.
Luigi: For those of us who don't speak anime, he might as well have been doing ninja rocket science in the womb.
Tails: He quickly mastered the use of chakra, a form of spiritual energy within all individuals that ninja can shape and weaponize. This is ninjutsu.
Luigi: He can walk up walls, heal wounds, and even make clones of himself. Plus, he's a master of taijutsu, AKA punchin' people. But his deadliest technique of all is the One Thousand Years of Death!
Kakashi: Leaf Village Secret Finger Jutsu...
Naruto: (screams)
Kakashi: A Thousand Years of Death!
Luigi: Oh-ho-ho! That's gonna get you on a list. Naruto's like, 12!
Tails: Chakra can also be molded into nature itself, and Kakashi can use it for numerous elemental attacks.
Luigi: Sure, he can shoot fireballs or dunk you with water, but his favorite is lightning! Lightning zaps, lightning clones, lightning... dogs?! That's awesome! How do I get one of those?
Tails: He's even invented a lightning ninjutsu technique: the Chidori. By gathering electric chakra into his hand or a kunai, he becomes capable of piercing just about anything.
Luigi: Even a bolt of actual lightning! Take that, nature! Man triumphs over you once again! Now if you'll excuse me I'm going to find a lightning dog to keep as a pet alongside my ghost dog.
Tails: Wait do lightning dogs even exist?
Luigi: I'm sure they do I wouldn't be surprised if they do. Imma head out to search. Bye.
Tails: Uhhh while Luigi tries to find this "lightning dog" that supposedly exists stay tuned next time for Kakashi's opponent aka the goat himself, Satoru Gojo.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
